Portal

New Portals

The Device has been modified so that it can now manufacture two linked portals at once.  

As part of an optional test protocol, we are pleased to present an amusing fact:  

The Device is now more valuable than the organs and combined incomes of everyone in Subject Hometown Here.  

(garble) fling yourself. (garble) fling into sp- [bzzt]  

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee[bzzt]"  

Now that you are in control of both portals, this next test could take a very, VERY, long time.  

If you become light-headed from thirst, feel free to pass out.  

An intubation associate will be dispatched to revive you with peptic salve and adrenaline.  

As part of a previously mentioned required test protocol, we can no longer lie to you.  

When the testing is over, you will be missed.  

All subjects intending to handle high-energy gamma leaking portal technology must be informed that they MAY be informed of applicable regulatory compliance issues.

No further compliance information is required or will be provided, and you are an excellent test subject! 

Very very good. A complimentary victory lift has been activated in the main chamber.  

The Enrichment Center is committed to the well being of all participants.  

Cake and grief counseling will be available at the conclusion of the test.  

Thank you for helping us help you help us all. 

Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science self esteem fund for girls? It's true!  

Due to mandatory scheduled maintenance, the appropriate chamber for this testing sequence is currently unavailable.  

It has been replaced with a live-fire course designed for military androids.  

The Enrichment Center apologizes for the inconvenience and wishes you the best of luck.  

Well done, android. The Enrichment Center once again reminds you that android hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance.  

The Vital Apparatus Vent will deliver a Weighted Companion Cube in Three. Two. One.  

This Weighted Companion Cube will accompany you through the test chamber. Please take care of it. 

The symptoms most commonly produced by Enrichment Center testing are superstition, perceiving inanimate objects as alive, and hallucinations. 

The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak.  

The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube cannot speak.  

In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.  

You did it! The Weighted Companion Cube certainly brought you good luck.  

However, it cannot accompany you for the rest of the test and, unfortunately, must be euthanized.  

Please escort your Companion Cube to the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator.  

Rest assured that an independent panel of ethicists has absolved the Enrichment Center, Aperture Science employees, and all test subjects of any moral responsibility for the Companion Cube euthanizing process.  

While it has been a faithful companion, your Companion Cube cannot accompany you through the rest of the test. If it could talk - and the Enrichment Center takes this opportunity to remind you that it cannot - it would tell you to go on without it because it would rather die in a fire than become a burden to you.  

Testing cannot continue until your Companion Cube has been incinerated.  

  Although the euthanizing process is remarkably painful, eight out of ten Aperture Science engineers believe that the Companion Cube is most likely incapable of feeling much pain.  

The Companion Cube cannot continue through the testing. State and Local statutory regulations prohibit it from simply remaining here, alone and companionless. You must euthanize it.  

Destroy your Companion Cube or the testing cannot continue.  

You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.