I feel myself falling again.
My heart shattering
And my life falling apart.
As tears roll down my face, I wonder.
They say that in life
There are many question marks.
But what if I am afraid of those question marks?
I don't like those uncertainties.
They say that when you are trapped
You are boxed in a room
With no idea where the door is.
However
In the room in which I am trapped
I know where the doors are.
There are simply too many to choose from
And I fear what lies behind them.
Is it bad to be scared?
Is it bad to fear the repercussions of opening a door
Because I am afraid of losing what is behind the others?
I yearn to open all the doors at once.
However
I only have two hands
And they do not reach far enough to even open two.
So when the time comes
What shall I do?
Shall I stay trapped?
Or simply open one
Knowing that I abandon so many other things I yearn for?
I do not yet know the answers to these many question marks
And because of this
I am still scared.
Because these are not question marks that affect others
But question marks I need to answer for myself.
I do not yet know how to find the answers to these questions marks.
Without guidance
I stay away from the doors
Until someone comes in to tell me what to do.
Until then
I stay huddled in the corner of my room with many doors.
