jυѕт lιѕтen тo мy voιce. || kritz fanfic

BE

/ s i x. /

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john.

I held Cameron's hand tightly, I walked closer to him and leaned against his shoulder, our feet almost colliding as we giggled softly on our way to his apartment. I used to hate working at the diner, but now that I see Cam every day at the diner, I began looking forward to working there. Of course, I'd get some prick that'd ruin my day but I'll see Cameron and his face would light me up inside.
I spaced out while walking, however, I heard him mumble something. "Did you say something?"
"No, I was just thinking."
"About me?"
"About going on an adventure with you," He smiled while glancing down at me. I gasped and let go of his hand to punch his shoulder (it wasn't that hard). "You weren't thinking about me? How dare you!"
"I always think about you! Pretty bold of you to assume that I don't," Cameron retorted, grabbing my hand again. I could tell he took it seriously so I just laughed. "I wanna go on another adventure with you."
"Then let's go tomorrow, sweetheart."
"It might not be as fun as the other ones, though."
"I don't care, Cam."
"But?"
"But as long as I'm with you, it'll be just as fun," I said, realizing how corny it was when Cameron started snickering. "Shut up, dummy."
"Rude."
"Says the guy who's laughing at me."
"Whatever," Cam huffed, watching his expression change except I didn't mention it, he seemed saddened. Our walk remained silent, listening to the sounds of the night that buzzed around us. Every now and then I took a glance at him, at my boyfriend.
And I smile.
Then I think, what would happen if I just left? Or maybe he'll leave me?
It's the thoughts in your head that mean the most, at least to me. The thoughts melted into my brain, things about the future and what it'd lead up too, what if I fuck up the best relationship I've had?
I don't know.
And that's what scares me the most.
"Honey?" Cameron stopped in his tracks, I snapped from my thoughts hearing his voice, looking into his blue eyes before realizing we'd arrived.
"Yeah?"
"You gonna be okay?"
"I'll be fine, Cam," I reassured, standing on my toes to place a quick kiss on his lips. "You go home, I'll see you in the morning."
"I love you," He mumbled under his breath, pulling me into a more passionate kiss as I kissed him back, my smile broke the kiss. "I love you too, dummy. Now shoo, go home."
"I know, I know," Cameron groaned, slowly turning his back with a wave, I waved goodbye and left with the smile still plastered on my face. I sighed almost dreamily, and to think Cameron was just a random customer at work surprised me, considering I've never spoken to somebody at work like that. I get a couple of small talks here and there, but never one where I actually skip work just to spend time with that person.
He's the first person.
My heart was bursting with love, as crummy as it sounds, I loved him just as much as he loves me.

-

Today was a slow day, not many people were inside and I actually wore my name tag instead of somebody else's so that was good, apart of me wanted to believe I would have a good day, considering I get to spend half of it with Cameron, yet my pessimistic mind decides to think that today would go badly. I was mopping the black and white tiled floors, music playing softly in my ears, watching to see if a customer or Cam would walk in. Instead, it was a boy I haven't seen in a while. "Swagger?"
"Sup', Johnny bitch boy."
"Wow, your good at greeting people."
"I have a special knack for not giving a fuck," He spoke sarcastically, his deep voice was the only thing heard in the diner beside the buzzes from the kitchen. "How've you been, John?"
"Fine, I guess. How about you?"
"Eh, better. It's summer, I have nothing to do anymore. So, I decided to come here," Swagger explained, sitting himself down at a booth. "You meet anybody yet?"
"Yeah, a boy."
"Oooh, a boy?" He spoke with an intrigued voice, his face resting against his hand. "What's his name?"
"Cameron-"
"Ah, that's a gay boy name, obviously. What's he like?"
"He's kinda like a guy I'm dating? I dunno how to describe people, man," I replied with a small chuckle, continuing to mop in the process.
"What? How can you not describe the guy your dating?"
"You really wanna know, don't you?"
"Why do you think I'm asking?"
"Shut up," I retorted. "Alright, he has blue eyes and like, dirty blond hair. He dresses like a badass but he's a huge fucking softie."
"Sounds like your type of dude."
"Literally, I didn't think he'd actually like me back. And now? I'm dating the best guy ev-"
"Okay okay, I don't wanna hear you fish over your boyfriend. That isn't what I'm here for," Swagger mentioned, tapping his fingers against the table in a rhythmic beat. "I want food so I cope with my eternal sadness."
"Oh, whatcha want? We aren't busy right now so I can cook ya something."
"Gimme a burger, you guys have that, right?"
"Yeah, we do. Just a regular cheeseburger?"
"Sure," Swagger shrugged, I nodded and placed the mop into the yellow bucket, walking to the kitchen for Swagger's burger. I glance up to see if Swagger was still there (he likes to ditch while I'm cooking) until I realize another familiar face walks across my view. I feel my hand burn, I hiss at the pain and immediately went to the sink, placing my hand in the cold water as I look back at the stove, I touched the stove with my hand.
'Well, I'm stupid as hell.'
I sighed, my hand was red and swelling with pain, I wrapped a cloth around it and continued cooking with my opposite hand. I finished Swagger's order and walk out with a tray, a burger resting on top of it. "Hell yeah! Thanks, John."
"No problem."
"Woah, did you burn yourself?"
"Ah, yeah. It'll be okay," I brushed off his statement, even though it hurt like hell, I know my hand will heal in time. I silently walked over to a different table where Cameron sat, he seemed sad; probably even more than sad, his eyes with tinted with red and his cheeks were a red as well, dried tears on his face. "Cameron? What happened?" I inquired worried, I sat next to him and watched as he didn't look at me. "Cameron? Sweetheart, answer me."
"It's-It's just my Dad, you know? I didn't get very much sleep last night," Cameron remarked, sniffling softly with every word. "I-I don't know what to do at this point."
"What'd he do?"
"Just acting like a prick, the usual," He paused, staring deep into the grey table in front of him. "It gets to me sometimes so that's why I look the way I do."
"It's fine to be upset, Cam. We're not gonna be eternally happy, especially with an asshole Dad, but if he does something to you again, I'm gonna smack his face into the ground and eat his kneecaps.
"I would appreciate it if you didn't do either of those," Cameron giggled lightly. "I'd rather sit here than you kick my Dad's ass, especially from my boyfriend but I ain't gonna let you."
"You're no fun," I responded with a roll of my eyes. "I'll be right back, hold on."
"Yeah," Cameron answered simply, his voice void of any emotion, I placed a kiss on his cheek before leaving to Swagger. I walked over and he was already asleep, the burger gone as his head was down on the table. "Swagger? Hey, dude wake up," I shook his shoulder softly, trying not to disturb him, but he and I both knew that he was a heavy sleeper so I blew air into his ear. "What the fuck!" Swagger sat up, rubbing his ear in discomfort, looking at me with a glare while I laughed. "Dude!"
"What? You act like I could help it!"
"You fucking cunt."
"You were asleep on the table, Swag. I can't let you stay here or we'll both get in trouble again," I added, grabbing the silver tray. "I wish I could let you stay-"
"Nah, it's cool. I didn't plan on staying again, just hungry," Swagger spoke, standing up from the table. "I'll see you later, John."
"Yeah, see ya later," I gave Swagger a small hug, he doesn't like hugs but I could care less, I felt him hug back for a moment before letting go and waving goodbye. I placed the silver tray on the counter inside the kitchen and left back to Cameron, who was playing with the silverware on the table. "Hey, Cam?" I asked, sitting down beside him again; he didn't answer me. "You were talking about another adventure, right? We can still go, there aren't any customers right now."
"Y-You still wanna go?"
"Of course I do, I never said I didn't want too."
"I know, I'm just feeling out of it. I'm sorry, honey," Cameron cupped his face with his hands, I wrapped my arm around him, tracing circles on his arm. "You're okay, sweetheart, don't be sorry. I don't expect you to be happy always, sometimes I feel out of it too, you'll be okay soon and I'll be here for you. I know adventures help you feel better, am I wrong?"
"No."
"Then let's get going, unless you wanna stay a little longer."
"No, no, it's okay," Cameron responded faintly, kissing my cheek with a deep breath, I looked into his eyes where there once was excitement and now there's tiredness clouding his bright blue eyes. "What?"
"Nothing, just admiring the view."
"You dork, go and change out of your uniform," He pushed me away, seeing him flustered just made my day. I laughed and stood up, walking into the kitchen as my heart fluttered out of my rib. I stumbled around the kitchen, thinking of Cameron made me just as flustered as he was. I silently changed into my normal clothes, ripped jeans and a hoodie was all I needed to feel like myself again. I stepped outside, seeing Cameron with his head down on the table, I sighed and placed my hand on his shoulder, mesmerizing blue eyes glared right into mine. "Hey sweetheart, let's get outta here."
"Okay," He followed as a command, grabbing my burnt hand and I hissed in pain, bringing my hand to my chest, seeing his face turn into hurt from my actions. "No, no, I didn't mean it like that. Look, I burnt my hand while cooking, I wanna hold your hand," I stumbled with my words, grabbing his hand with my good hand, his face lit up a little bit however the pain was still seen on his face. We walked outside, the warm breeze hitting my face while the sun was tucked away underneath the clouds, most of the sun rays shined through most of the clouds. I realized the path we were walking felt too familiar.
"Isn't this the way to the abandoned apartments?" I asked, looking up to Cameron in confusion.
"Yeah but the place we're going is kinda close to there," Cameron continued. "I think you're gonna like it, although it isn't that fun."
"That's fine with me," I shrugged, squeezing his hand. I couldn't think of anything, usually in situations where somebody's sad I try and help, but my mind was blank. I cringed at myself, realizing the awkwardness flowing in the air along with the silence making me slightly anxious. I tried focusing on the positive things like how I get to spend time with my boyfriend and I get to hold his hand, I get to hug him and kiss him. Nobody else can.