My Killer Girlfriend

Welcome To The Family

"Where the fuck is the sour cream?!"

"Hood, pass me the spatula, please."

"I want my fucking sour cream!"

"Momma Jess! I want something to drink!"

"Stop touching my tits!"

"Get your hands of my breasts before I roast them on the grill!"

"Jackie, get your food off the stove!"

"EVER'ONE GIT AHT!!"

Everyone froze as Masquerades usual calm, quite voice pierced the air. She stood by the sink, hands in fists at her side, visibly shaking.

"Holy....shit..." Jess said, what was left of her eyelids flexed as a form of shocked blink.

You sat at a bar stool by the counter, munching on a burger Masquerade had made for you before all hell broke loose. You simply stared ahead at the girls, curious as to how this would play out. All the girls seemed frozen in place by the usually quiet girls outburst. Hoodlum was the first to move, patting Masquerades shoulder and turning to the others.

"You heard her, get out." She said firmly. The others hesitated before Hoodlum pulled out a glock, pointing it at the ceiling. "OUT!" The girls were quick to move; Jackie quickly placing whatever was in the skillet onto a plate and slipping from the room, Jill strolling out calmly. Tami made a mad dash for the patio doors, only her twitching caused her to fall multiple times...followed by her face-planting into the glass door (which made you wince). Sammy grabbed his stuffed rabbit and skipped out. Jess took her sweet time leaving, trailing a hand along the counter as she strolled passed Hoodlum and Masquerade, eyeing them with a mixed expression of threatening and uncaring. She strolled to you, draping a slim, toned arm around you, grabbing your plate and leading you out. You followed, not wanting to deal with anything.

"I still want my sour cream." Jess said over her shoudler as you to slipped out of the kitchen.

Comically, the moment you to were passed the entrance, a carton of sour cream went whizzing through the air, hitting the wall where Jess was standing a split second before.

"Sour cream?"

"Goes great on burgers." She answered simply with a nod. You just shook your head with a smile.

++++++++++++++++

You and Jess were sitting on the front stoop, just staring our at the forest that surrounded the mansion. Jess sat near the top of the steps while you sat near the bottom, leaning against the steps.

"Is that normal?" You asked over your shoulder.

Jess nodded, not looking up from the lock of hair she held in front of her face. "Yeah, though tonight was pretty mellow."

"A gun was drawn."

"And normally a gun is fired. Tami got hit last time. Was pretty funny." Jess smiled, finally looking at you.

"Tami was shot?" You asked, rotating your torso to look at her.

"Yeah, Tami's got this weird...nerve disorder or something. She can't feel pain."

"No pain?"

"Yep. I could stab her and she'd just keep doing what she was doing. And I have before."

"Of course you have." You smiled, shaking your head. Jess opened her mouth to reply when something hit her forehead and fell into her lap. Both of you blinked (you did anyway) and Jess grabbed it, holding it up to find an antique pocket watch.

"You did say you collected the, right?" A voice asked behind you (AUTHOR BREAKS TO SLEEP ON THE FLOOR IN THE MIDDLE OF SCHOOL). You turned, looking up to see a man standing in front of you. He was tall, maybe a few inches taller than you and well bit in that athletic way. He looked down at you with a bright green eye with curiosity. You stared back because you realised this person was...strange.

Along the sides of his mouth were stitches, like he was was cut with a smile much like Jess's but smaller. He had one green eye to look down at you from, because you saw his left eye was gone. A pocket watch replaced it.

"Who's the dude?" He asked, nodding to you.

"Hmm? Oh, that's _________, my boyfriend." Jess answered, inspecting the pocket watch.

"Do you like it?" He asked, stepping passed you and going to Jess. and standing over her. "I found it at my last victims."

Jess wrapped the chain around her finger, holding it up to look at it head on. "It's beautiful. But I don't collect the, Clock." She said, looking up at him.

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. I said I liked how they looked, not that I collected them." She clarified before colelcting it in one hand and depositing it between her large breasts. "I do like it, so I'll keep it." She said before smiling at him.

'Clock' nodded, turning his gaze on you. "_______? Right?" You nodded. He stared at you a moment longer before shrugging. "Cool. Welcome to the family."