Jarens POV
I fucking made it. And it made me so fucking happy.
John was so fucking happy.
I'm still having check ups done to me to make sure I can go home.
They need it check the baby.
They put the weird gel stuff on the stick like thing. It's really cold. I scrunch my face back up because it feels so weird and I hear John laugh.
Just like he did before when we were checking on the baby. But that's before I could have died.
There's a gasp heard from the doctor. I look over quickly to the monitor that shows the inside of my stomach.
There was something there before.
But not anymore.
We both broke down. There's no other way to react.
How the hell do you react when you lose your first child. When you lose your child for that matter.
I can't believe this happened. Why me? Why is God?
Why couldn't we be a normal happy couple and have our kid in piece?!
WHY GOD FUCKING DAMBIT?!!
I scream in anger, sitting up. Then I broke down again.
The salty tears staining my face. I feel it drip
from my chin to my legs. I feel the liquid touch my skin.
I feel Johns hand grip mine. It's the most comforting thing I have at the moment.
I hug him and I keep repeating two words.
I'm sorry.
"It's okay baby. It's not your fault." He whispers to me and it some how gives me a feeling of trust that it's not my fault.
(Did that make sense?)
I cry into his shoulder slowly but because I've cried so much my sobs become silent and I've run out of breath.
I feel so tired and John can see that. He hugs me tight and I fall asleep with images of John In mind.
I wish this day never happened.
Johns POV
I smile at his sleeping figure with his red puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks. He looks so sleep deprived so I carry him to the front desk so I can ask if I can take him home.
I walk up to the front desk and see a women behind it.
"Name" she says in a bored tone as she looks up. Once she sees me her whole mood changes. She puts her elbows on the desk and place her boobs on the bench trying to make them look bigger.
"Im here to check my fiancé out, Jaren Smith" I say emphasising Fiancé. Even though Jaren isn't my fiancé I'm going to pop the question soon.
Her fake smile instantly changes as I nod my head toward the sleeping boy in my arms.
"You can go" she says as she slumps back into her chair behind the desk. I chuckle at her and walk away.
I smile at the sleeping boy in my arms. God I'm so blessed to have him.
I'm hoping he isn't still mourning over how "he" lost Our baby.
Because.
I want to try again.
May seem sudden but I want a child as much as he does. All though it wasn't planned to have our baby once we found out we were thrilled.
I love him so so much. And I wish we could be happy. I want him to be happy.
He is my world. And I never ever ever want to leave him.
As I eventually arrive back at campus there's a lot of kids near the fountain.
They are all on their phones and once I pass by them they lift their heads.
"JOHN?! JAREN?!" Voices yell and I realise it's the guys.
"Uhh hey guys. If you mind could you be a little quieter this ones sleeping" i mumble to them directing my speech to Jaren.
"How is he? Is he Ok? What about the baby?" That word breaks my world.
A few tears leave my eyes and trickle down my cheek. The boys obviously realise this and they circle around me and the sleeping boy in my arms saying that their sorry for our loss.
I smile at all do them thanking him then walk back to our room. On the way back a few people look at me and the Canadian in my arms weirdly, they knew Jaren was supposed to die.
I carried him into our room and placed him on his bed. He was still in his clothes from yesterday so I decided to take of his jeans and shirt.
I accidentally woke him up while I was pulling his pants down and he got startled by it but once he realised it was me he groaned at our position.
"God your a horny dog" I mumble
"Well then fuck me john" he says obviously hearing my statement.
What he says made me blush lightly but I obeyed his orders and did just that. Let's just say, we didn't sleep that night.
Short if fucking know but it's Christmas Eve and I'm trying to get everything set up and all my friends moving into my house so I'm pretty busy. Hope you enjoyed. Busy time guys. See you next week or something
