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I was guarding lockup. Pike had commanded to make every Grounder in camp a prisoner. The last thing we needed was them attacking us from the inside. That included Lincoln. It didn't please me, but I was just following orders. Before they were all inside the cell, Octavia appeared out of nowhere, calling for Lincoln, but he was quick to ease her mind, telling him, he was fine.
- "What the hell is going on?"
- "We're interning the Grounders." –I answered, she turning to face me- "Lincoln's here because of a disturbance in the Medical Centre."
- "What's happening to you?"
- "Octavia..."
- "I saw what you and Pike did to Lexa's army. Bellamy, you killed everyone!" –she started yelling at me, catching the attention of the other guards.
- "Keep your voice down."
- "What's wrong? You're not proud of massacring an army that was here to help us? You're not proud of taking orders from the man that got my sister assassinated?" –she had lowered her tone and her voice broke when talking about Sam.
- "We're not doing this here."
- "Good, then let's go because I'm not even close to done."
She looked at me with rage in her eyes, waiting for my move, so I pulled her with me through one of the hallways but she got rid of me to look at Lincoln one more time before we started walking together.
- "You need to be careful, O. If you keep this up I won't be able to protect you."
- "Thanks for the warning." -she mocked me.
- "I'm serious."
- "Me too." –she stopped walking for a second, looking at me up and down- "We all know how good you protected Sam."
- "She should have stopped playing Grounder and you should too."
- "Are you hearing yourself? Do you even love her?"
- "You know I did, O." –she raised an eyebrow at me.
- "Did."
- "Yes, she's dead and we have to move on."
I wasn't being honest, I'd always love Sam, but I didn't know how to deal with everything I was feeling, so I decided, the best I could do for now was shove it all down, wait until we were safe to allow myself to break down. I wouldn't forgive myself if something happened to someone else, just because I was mourning Sam. I knew she'd hate me if someone died because of me. She was dead because of me. She probably hated me, wherever she was.
