INFJ Me

Privacy Bubble

      I know it has been a long time since I write but let's just say university is keeping me occupied and my level of inspiration had never reach the threshold yet. I do not like to write halfheartedly, hence why I keep postponing to post. 

       Now, back to the topic for this chap. I just want to share one of the issue I am having nowadays (just how many issue I have lol) that is the contradictions between my want for social life and the need for solitude or alone time. Yes, INFJs might be really private but that does not mean we hate human, in fact we find people really intriguing to be explored (at least for me) and this curiosity is what driving me to join activities especially volunteering and meet new acquaintances (notice how I'm not using 'friend' here) but at the same time my crucial need for some alone time is throbbing every time I overspend that is also equal with normal people socializing time. 

      It is quite fun to be able to meet and analyze new kind of people but the exhaustion afterwards often left me wondering, 'Do I really want those things?' I love and really treasure my privacy and alone time but few weeks back, I had to jeopardized my need. Other reason why I had to is because I stay on college and I have to gain enough credits by joining program, so that I can stay on college for next year. Do you feel how troublesome that is for me, a truly introvert and private person?

Not only I have to join but I have to be forced to join?!

      After quite busy and hectic weeks with program, I have finally settled down and is currently recharging myself which means a week without meeting anyone except my family (luckily, it's study week right now). Playing games and eat a lot of favourite food help too. But, there is also my selfish desire for my friends to reach out and contact me, even though I know I still do not have the feel to entertain them. Complicated, I know. 

      Proceeding to second issue, I have noticed one thing about me for quite some years and my roommate who is also an INFJ (what a coincidence, I know) feel the same thing. Everytime I make new friend in such a short period of time, I get really overwhelmed and soon it turned to annoyance towards them and later, I felt guilty because I was annoyed at that. First week might be okay but at the end of second, the overwhelming feeling starts to kick in. 

     Often in situation like this, I believe that the new friend's presence is thought as an intruder to my private life like I prefer routine and life that I can predict, so when she suddenly comes in, few things change and I guess my system need time to adjust. Often in this situation, I avoided her because I was afraid that my annoyance towards her will resurface and hurt her, so I left her alone to deal with my guilt and adjustment. This is also to give my some time to reflect and make sense of the new friend in my life lol. My roommate did the same thing. She was very excited and relieved when I told her I felt the same thing and I had to convinced her that what we did is not a bad thing, it is just part of our reflex personality. 

That is all for this chapter, quite long huh. Honestly, I do not know how my writing schedule works but what I know is that I enjoy writing and sharing with you guys! I just want to say thank you very much for those who stick with me and the new one that have joined in, thank you :)

Ps; love it when you guys share your thought 

Until next time, 

naiorim, your fellow INFJ