Reputations

Chapter 37

Niall

I woke up when I felt Sam slightly jump as she woke up. Her head was turned around looking at the door. I lifted my head up off the floor to see her looking at Lisa who had walked in to find us sleeping on the floor cuddling close to each other. I laughed a little as Lisa exclaimed, "What the fuck?" She shook her head and quickly apologized. She shut the door immediately as if she had walked in on us doing something other than sleeping. I moved Sam off of me and grabbed my jacket. "We probably shouldn't tell anyone about this." She looked confused, but nodded her head and I walked out of the bathroom, and I told Lisa the same thing I said to Sam.

I went back to the frat house hoping everyone was still asleep and that they wouldn't notice I was just coming home. I went up to my room hating myself for last night, but I wasn't able to regret the time spent with Sam. I didn't regret a single thing that transpired between me and Dave. Honestly, he deserved worse than a simple punch to the jaw.

I couldn't get my head straight, so I had to recount all of the nights events. I had to know what it was that was making me feel this way. We had sex, and that was great. I had been going crazy thinking about being with her like that again. Not even just recently. I had been that way for two years. We had both been craving that from each other. I went into her room, and we were locked in her bathroom. The longer I was alone with her the more I felt like myself and wanted to be that guy again. I couldn't just give up my reputation and it's not like I would just come crawling back to Sam like nothing happened. There's no way that would work out between us. Especially since I had been so rude from the start. I didn't think I wanted a relationship with her, but I definitely didn't want it with anyone else either. I couldn't take it if she ended things again. I also didn't want her to be with anyone else. I just needed to distance myself from her, and we would both be able to forget all this happened. I needed to be able to make sure it didn't happen again. There was no way it would end well for either of us. One of us was going to end up hurt. I knew how to make sure it wasn't me. The hard part was going to be making myself stay away from her and making sure my way didn't hurt her.

I threw another party that night and I was relieved when Sam didn't show up. I was finally able to not constantly think about her or look for her. I was able to mindlessly enjoy a party. My main focus was trying to temporarily forget about her. I got completely wasted and ended up having sex with a random girl in the bathroom even though I had a perfectly fine bedroom.

I woke up with a massive headache, but I made my way to my first class. I hated going to my classes and listening to the teacher yammer on and on about things I already understood. I was the last person into the room out of pure dread. My eyes immediately landed on Sam as usual. My eyes always went straight to her as if she were walking around with flashing lights surrounding her. She immediately looked over as if she thought the same about me. It was as if we had a sixth sense on knowing when we were in the same vicinity. She was sitting with Timothy, Lisa, and Ben. Timothy waved me over and the only seat was beside Sam. I couldn't tell if he did that on purpose or not. He had been doing a lot of intentional things to push us closer like that lately. Timothy leaned down to me.

"I'm surprised you came to class today! You got pretty drunk last night at the last welcome back party, and you rarely come to classes as it is. I'm glad you showed up." He quietly laughed and patted my back. I knew he only meant it to taunt me because Sam ended up being in the same class. He had been calling me out a lot more than he usually did. Between that and Sam being here it really made me realize how much I had changed over time without ever noticing when clearly everyone else had. They just never pointed it out to me until Sam came back to be the first one to tell me.

"Well, it's the first day, so I have to let them know I exist." The teacher came in and started class. Sam leaned over to me when the teacher turned around. I had hoped she wouldn't try and talk to me, but at the same time I just wanted it to be us trapped together in her bathroom again.