Bucky Barnes Imagine

Thank you.

Mission retrieve Winter Soldier's trigger book was a fail. You blamed yourself for what had happened, if you didn't hesitate to kill that Hydra agent disguised as an innocent young woman and if you didn't think twice about burning the book along with the building, Bucky would have been living a carefree life by now, he would have been over with all the nightmares by now. Why, why did I hesitate, just why? you thought to yourself.

You kept punching the sandbag in front of you, deafening sound of the contact between the sandbag and your fist echoed the room. Every punch was harder than the previous, sharp pain spreading across your knuckles, though it didn't bother you at all knowing the fact that it hurts you more that you couldn't give Bucky his peaceful life back.

"y/n--" Steve exclaims as he saw blood running down your knuckles and dripping from the sandbag, but you were so focused on the bag you didn't notice Steve in the room with you. Thoughts running through your head on how things would have ended if it weren't because of your hesitation. You imagined seeing him smile every single day, him enjoying the pool on your days off. Tears welled up in your eyes with every thought of how happy he would have been.

"Stop!" Steve pulled you back and held onto your arms to calm you down. "Nobody wants this to happen, it's not your fault, don't blame yourself, Bucky wouldn't like it and you know that."

You flashed back to a week ago when Steve told you that Bucky had feelings for you, you took care of him everyday since the day he joined the Avengers, you tried to help him recollect his memories piece by piece so that he can be himself again. You were an angel to him, it kills him if he knew you were hurt because he cares about you a lot, you mean the world to him.

"I failed the mission! This is the first time I've ever fail a mission! The first! And I volunteered for this and I let Bucky down! I don't care if it kills me, I'm gonna find that bastard and hunt him down myself!" you snapped and swung yourself loose from Steve's grip with warm tears running down your cheeks, heat rose in your body, adrenaline pumping through your veins. You stormed out of the room and ran down to the headquarter.

You bust open the door with blood still dripping down the back of your hand while you clenched your fist. "Did you find that prick?" you walked up to one of the agents tracking down the where about of the book. The agent looked stunned, looking at you with blood all over your hand and your eyes filled with anger and rage. "yes--umm--he's in an abandoned warehouse just 20 miles from here, I think he's coming for Bucky." he said as he sent the location to your phone.

"Not 'till I kill him first." you ran out of the headquarter to the garage and took off.

You took Steve's bike because you could reach there faster than a car, you wanted to end all of this as soon as you could, you didn't want Bucky to live in fear everyday because of the trigger words. Your phone rang and you looked down, it was Steve, you answered the phone.

"y/n, what the hell do you think you're doing! Come back right now!" Steve commands you over the phone.

"I'm going to finish my mission--" you drove faster down the highway.

"Doll--" a familiar voice came through your earpiece. It was Bucky, his voice was trembling in fear and so delicate. "Please come back, I need you here with me, I can't lose you--"

You held back your tears, your throat tingling from the urge to cry. "I have to do this Bear, I'm sorry, I love you--"you cut him off before he could change your mind.

You arrived at the warehouse, you bust open the door just to find the agent trying to learn the trigger words. He stood up immediately and reached for his gun before pointing it at you. "I believe you have something that belongs to me--" you used your powers and threw him across the warehouse. He got back up almost instantly, that's what Hydra agents are trained to do, endure pain and never give up.

"Is that all you got?" he gave you a smirk.

"I don't have to use my powers to kill you son of bitch--" you threw a punch at him but he blocked it with his arm, he saw an opening on your left and kicked your torso. You yelped, feeling a bruise rising up from your delicate skin. You stepped back, staring at him with anger in your vein.

You jumped onto his shoulder, legs wrapped around his neck, elbow socking the top of his head. He threw you to the ground making you hit the concrete floor hard, you were punching his face as hard as you did when you punched the sandbag back in the tower. The thoughts came back, how happy Bucky looked in your mind, making you punch a little harder every punch. Blood gushing out of his wound on his face, he endured the pain and swung you across the room into a table hitting the back of your head. The book fell along with the table. It was right next to you, you grabbed it instantly and held it tight to your chest.

Throbbing pain dispersed at the back of your head, you could barely stand up, you shook it off, back into battle mode. "You just don't know when to give up do you?" he pulled out a knife from his back pocket. Before you could react, he drove his knife deep into your body. "Not so tough now huh?" he whispered into your ear but you still held onto the book so tightly.

Warm blood flowing down your legs, you used the last of your strength and your power to knock him out cold. You fell to the ground into your own pool of blood. 

"y/n!" 

"Bucky--"

To be continued in part two :)