As Seen On TV

25. You?!?

***WARNING: The following chapter contains some explicit imagery, of a very sexual nature, nudge, wink. It's not extremely graphic, but I also am aware that everyone has their own comfort zones. Friendly warning to proceed with caution; more to come.***

I was aching. It was all I could think about as I attempted to calm the nerves that sparked like little electrical wires in my stomach, causing me to fidget almost constantly in the passenger seat of Andrew's car. 

I was aching on the inside- Andrew's confession about his mother and his subsequent baring of his soul to me (and I to him) had left me emotionally raw and unsure of what our next step was, as a couple. I still couldn't quite quell the feeling that I wasn't good enough for him- that he deserved better, and that I deserved worse. Or, even worse than that, that I was only thinking I deserved worse because I wanted worse...

But I was also physically aching. After Andrew told me all about his mom, we ended up talking for hours about anything and everything; the rest of his family, his tense sibling-rival dynamic with Teddy, Jr, his paternal instincts for his younger siblings and cousins, how different we were from each other. I even talked about myself for a bit, telling him what little there was to tell about my childhood and my family. I ended up talking about my past relationships, however few and far in between they were, and I talked about Dylan for a fair bit, to my dismay. It was weird, though; lying on Andrew's chest there, fully content, feeling his heart beat behind me and his arms encircling in front of me, I think I felt a bit like my old self. The Lyra before losing her job, losing her dog, losing her old boyfriend. 

I could now say with certainty that I was over all of it. I was ready for whatever may come.

In my case, 'whatever may come' had turned out to be sex. Lots of it. And that's why I was physically aching.

The minutes stretched on in silence after we had finally run out of things to say. The energy to say them was still there, but somehow, we both independently had come to the conclusion that that energy could be put to better use elsewhere...

***WARNING: The innocent who wish to preserve their innocence may stop here.***

***Like seriously, stop reading now. You have been warned.***

"You having trouble sleeping, too?"

I turned to him, his eyes bright and searching, looking as if he felt much like I felt on the inside.

"You know me so well."

"Maybe we should do something that'll really tire us out."

"Ms. Kennedy, are you suggesting what I think you're suggesting?"

"Depends. What do you think I'm suggesting?" 

A smile, followed by a rustling of sheets. Suddenly, strong arms were around me and flipping me over on top of him. His hard muscles felt taut and defined under the thin material of my oversized t-shirt. 

I leaned down and pressed my face close to his, my hair falling in orange cascades around both of our heads, forming a small sort of makeshift cave to hide our smiles. 

"This," he whispered, ever so faintly, and then my lips were on his, asking. He answered, with passion, moving his lips to the rhythm I had determined. Despite our kisses, neither of us could stop smiling, perhaps pondering the three words we had exchanged not too long ago. I felt like a kid again.

But not so much of a kid. He broke the intimate contact of our lips to slide his large, gentle hands down to my waist, resting them there and looking at me with a desire that I, too, felt. Rather deeply.