Part 13

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Seventeen Years Later

"I'm just trying to get you to face facts, Engle

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"I'm just trying to get you to face facts, Engle.  You haven't taken time off since you married that woman, take a leave of absence, maybe take your kid on a trip.  You're wound too damn tight." He said.

"Thanks for your concern, but I have it under control." I'm getting irritated.

"A divorce can be just as rough as a death in your family, you heard me, Engle.  One month, and we will revisit this."

I slammed my locker shut.  "I didn't do anything outside of protocol, now isn't the time to do this, sir."

"You almost cost your partner his life!  Get your shit together, and concentrate on your kid for now." He was very clear.

He walked out of the locker room and slammed the door shut.  I grabbed my wallet, keys, and badge, then stormed out to my car. 

My life has completely fallen apart, and there's just one person I need to see right now.

I drove my car into the driveway that was once mine.  The house we built together sits in front of me, and I take a deep breath to calm myself.  The divorce was just final yesterday, but he's already moved into my home.

The front door opened and my eight-year-old son came running out.  "Dad!"

I got out and messed his hair up.  "Ready?"

"Not yet, here's his bag.  Remember he goes to bed by nine, and has to be at school by eight on Monday."

My now ex-wife hands me my sons gym bag. 

"Right" I looked down at Jake.  "Ready now?"

He nodded with a big smile on his face.  I lifted him up into the back seat of my pickup and strapped him in before shutting the door.

"When are you going to get rid of that chip on your shoulder?  Jake picks up on the tension between us Hudson."  She said.

"Maybe when I forget my wife was fucking another man in my house, don't ask for pleasantries, Hannah." I said.

"You were never here, Hudson.  What did you think would happen?"  She asked.

"Don't give me that shit, Hannah.  I was in the marines, and on active duty.  I gave that up when my time came for you, and that was years ago.  My father traveled three weeks out of the month, and my mom was faithful."  I said.

"Yeah, faithful to sleeping pills and wine.  Is that what you'd rather see me doing?  We've been over for years now, and you know it's true."  She said.

"Don't you ever talk about my mother and her problems.  No, I had no idea you thought we were done.  Quit trying to put this on me."  I said.

"Fine, maybe someday you'll figure out what you want and find happiness.  You've been restless since the moment we met, and I guess I'm stupid to think you'd ever change." She stood there with her arms crossed.

"Whatever Hannah, tell yourself what you want to hear so you can sleep at night." I got into my truck, and took a deep breath.

"Dad, can we get pizza?" Jake asked, with a big excited smile.

"Sure, whatever you want kid." I backed out of my own driveway, and drove to the pizza parlor. 

I try to keep up appearances for Jake's sake, but it's hard when you hate the world.

I was 18 when 911 happened.  I abandoned college and joined the Marines, and married Hannah, who I met just after boot camp, then did several tours in Iraq and Afghanistan. Joining the Marines and abandoning my career goals, was actually about as self-destructive as it gets.

I got out and went back to college, while Hannah supported us, then I went to Quantico for training.  I've been with the FBI for several years now. 

I've never gone a month without working.  I can't believe I made such a dickhead move, but I have a good reputation and exemplary record.  Cummings is just being tough, and it's not necessary.

I know I've not been the same since Joey, but that's history.  A history that's buried in my past, and that's where it will stay.

Living in Washington D.C. isn't so terrible.  I'm used to not having one place to call home, so living in an apartment isn't so strange for me.  My dad retired last year, and they're still living back in Texas.  I haven't been home in years, and it's not because I avoid it, I'm just busy with work, and up until a few months ago, I had a wife, son, and a house to take care of,  but now I have no excuse.

I called Hannah, and she's going to let me take Jake back home for a few weeks.  He only has four days of school left before he is out for summer break.

My mom was excited to hear we are coming for a visit, so I'm sure it'll be over the top.

I tucked Jake into his bed, got a beer, and sat on my balcony to examine my life.  I still talk to Joel and Doug, Doug just started having kids about the same time as Jake was born.  Joel and Amber had one kid senior year, but have worked hard, and just started having kids again.  They never mention Joey, or if she has visited her father. 

I pulled out my wallet and stared at the picture of the girl who has haunted me for so many years.  I can't help but wonder what my life would have been, if Joey didn't give up on us.  I've never heard another thing about her in all these years. I have looked, but not intensively.  I respected her wishes all these years.




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