Occhiolism (#2 in the Hajar Series) [ON HOLD]

eight

chapter eight - mad'ouk

[(مدعوك) - n. - someone that has been toughened by one's life and experiences]

song of the chapter: don't watch me cry - jorja smith

--

FARAH FELT EMPTY as the two guards ushered her to a large black SUV. She felt her heels dragging numbly against the floor, climbing into the backseat. She could hear the sound of shouting and footsteps behind her as the door closed after she slid onto the leather, she didn't even have enough energy to peer through the tinted window to see who it was.

The driver's side opened as well as the door opposite to her. Shaken, Alexander sat in front of the steering wheel, sticking the keys into the ignition as one of the guards got into the seat across from her, the other in the passenger. She could feel the burning brown eyes of Alexander through the rearview mirror, but he too said nothing.

She leaned her head against the glass, shutting her eyes tight. God, how she wished this were all some fucked up nightmare. She'd love to wake up now, to know that this was all just some twisted figment of her imagination. Farah nearly sardonically laughed, it sounded like some shit straight out of a book. She didn't know what to do, her throat and eyes felt prickly from the need to cry, while her brain was... well, she didn't even know what it was doing.

She wanted to sleep forever.

The car began reversing, pulling out of the diner that she knew she couldn't go back to, even if she wanted to.

Israfil.

Her stomach dropped.

Farah forced herself to think about something else. But she couldn't, there wasn't anything else, there wasn't anyone else. Farah felt betrayed by him. How could he have lied to her like that, knowing her past, how could he have deceived her for so long? Farah felt stupid. She didn't know why she was surprised, it's not like this hadn't happened before. Her putting her trust in someone only for them to lie to her face.

"I get why you're upset," were the first words to come out of Alexander's mouth, snapping Farah out of her thoughts. "I get it Farah, and you get to be mad."

She glared hard at the window, blinking back tears. "I don't need your permission to be mad," she bit out, sounding snarky and shaky. "You were in on all of this shit too, don't act like you're innocent. I'm not as angry at you as I am at him. You don't owe me shit. You don't owe me your honesty."