"𝖒𝖔𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖔𝖓𝖌𝖚𝖊" : 𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔪𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔞𝔯𝔶 𝔠𝔯𝔢𝔴 𝔬𝔫𝔢-𝔰𝔥𝔬𝔱𝔰

"my blood" by twenty one pilots (jamesxalex)

author's note

i'm actually thinking of changing my update schedule to monday and friday, gives me time to actually work on the shit i want to pump out. by the way, i'm going to say this now, this book is in no way meant to disrespect the girlfriends. this entire chapter took twice as long to upload because i was fucking passing out from exhaustion so sorry if i missed any mistakes.

alex : you here yet?

me : yeah, can you or george come to the door?

alex : george's at will's and you can let yourself in

alex : the door's unlocked

me : is that safe?

alex : no, maybe, shut up

alex : and don't tell george

i roll my eyes, shutting my phone off and pocketing it. the temperature drops a good ten degrees when i step into the flat, and it was already chilly enough outside.

"mate, it's fuckin' freezing in 'ere!" i call to alex, leaving my shoes by the door and dropping my backpack on the couch."is this a challenge i 'aven't heard 'f, livin' in the fuckin' arctic for s day?"

"oh, piss off, james," the boy mumbles drowsily, walking by me to get to the kitchen. it's awfully hard to keep my eyes off him when he's wearing nothing but a sweatshirt and boxers. both of which reach nowhere past halfway down his thighs. "was too lazy to turn the heatin' on this mornin'."

"how haven't you got hypothermia yet? d'you need a jacket or something? y'even 'ave one?" i jape loudly. alex clenches his eyes shut with a pained expression, pressing on them with his nose scrunched up. any upcoming laughter stops in my throat, worry bubbling instead. "you okay, al?" he nods, rubbing his temples.

"yeah, mate, all 's good. can you just stop shouting so much?" he yawns. "m'head hurts, didn't sleep much last night." i raise an eyebrow. he doesn't acknowledge my skepticism, sniffling as he rubs his nose, taking the bag out of the tea he was making to put it in the bin. "ready to film?" i cross my arms over my chest intimidatingly and stand in his way. the sleepless night colourfully obvious in the blue-black bags under his eyes, the slurred speech, the tired way he was carrying himself, the runny nose, it all clicks. i sigh. not again, we've been over this.

"are you ready to film?" i ask. alex frowns, confused. "you sound a bit sick to me." he rolls his eyes in exasperation. 

"you sound like george," he snaps. "leave m'alone, 've already got one mum, don't need 'nother."

"i'll call up your mum if that's what it takes for you to take a break when you're ill." he tries to push past me but i'm not having it. i grab his shoulders and pull him back to face me. "alex..." i warn.

"piss off, james, can we please jus' go film?"

"this is extremely self-destructive, alex. 've told you many times, you're not gonna get better like this." he curls his fingers into a fist, obviously tense and pent-up.

"i know, i just don't give a shit. i have things i need to get done and i can't take a day 'ff because my damn body's decided 't wants t' pussy out!" my face falls in disappointment and i know he can see it. he softens, tearing up. "it-it makes me hate myself."

"alex..." his breathing is shaky and he swallows. "i thought 've talked about pushing yourself like this. y'know we hate to see you do this to yourself. one or two days off won't hurt you or anyone else. you can't blame yourself fo' once in a while falling sick. 't happens t' everyone, mate. even the best of us." he puts down his tea, head hanging to hide spilling tears, and extends his arms. i take him into mine, accepting the hug wholeheartedly, and and rest my chin on his head. "good lad..." i whisper and press a chaste kiss into his hair. he's so much smaller than me. this feeling of needing to take care of him is intoxicating.

"george's a'ready slagged m'off fo' this today."

"he was right to, love," i murmur, "you need to rest and start taking better care of yourself." the nineteen year old grumbles something incomprehensible, face buried in my chest. my stomach fills with butterflies. "y'wan' me t'stay over and take care of you for now?" he sheepishly shakes his head, sniffling.

"i can take care 'f myself!" with how much the little boy is trembling, my mind is already made up.

"absolutely not. 'll be seconds out the door and y'll be filming the video on your own." alex melts into my arms and my knees weaken a little at how precious he is. i can't keep chastising him like this. "come on, love, let's 'ave you lay down for a little bit."

"m'bones 'urt, james," he drawls out, "took tylenol 'fore you came but 't still 'urts!" i guide him to the couch, he nearly collapses. the only energy he musters is to climb into my lap, head on my chest. 

"well, you should give it a bit for it t'start working, you reckon?" he whines. i rest my hands on his cold thighs. his breathe hitches and he shudders. my heart swells with love at the reaction. "'f rather focus on gettin' you warm now." he nods sleepily as i drape the only blanket i can reach on the couch over him. he's tiny. his fingers bunch my shirt up. i can't get enough of this.

"can we film when i wake up?"

"only if you're better."

903 words