Crimson Bonds - ALL GXG VERSION (Hailee Steinfeld X Bridgette Lundy-Paine )

Chapter 17: Unbreaking The Habit

I come home in a foul mood. I just want to forget everything that happened today. Once again it wasn't my sister who almost broke our cover, but it was me. How the fuck did I get roped into grabbing drinks with the human I literally wanted to drink from? In the end I almost lost it at the very thought.

Me and Carter were finally all alone. After shoving her body onto that locker I was moments from ravenously feeding from her. With scaring Nate and his friends off, there would have been no one to catch me in the act. I heard everything the boy said from start to finish. And although he had me enraged due to both his brutality and one hell of a mouth, I wouldn't have minded giving Nate more of a performance than I already had to make him eat his own words. And the best part would have been Carter being the very star of the show. When it was hinted she was a virgin, I couldn't deny my heightened curiosity of her sexuality, more so how far her and this Jess had ever gone together. Due to the other brunette's evident disgust of my very presence and Carter not giving her the time of day, I could tell not very far. It was indeed entertaining as the girl tried way too hard. Though I knew I could satisfy Carter much more than she ever could, my predatory nature flaring at the very thought of Jess even resting her eyes upon her.

"God...I sound more like an actual adolescent every second I associate myself with them..."

Nate surely wasn't wrong, for I want to be Carter's first and her last. I would love nothing more than to claim her in any and every way I could have her. The butch girl was undeniably attractive. Her innocence I had forgotten as I dealt with Nate, feeling her every nerve and heightened emotion from fear to even sexual arousal. It made the blood run rapidly through her veins, even more noticeable within the most sacred places of her body. She was being salacious without even knowing it, and it turned me on to the fullest extent.

Although making herself out to be the good guy Carter made me completely stimulated with raw desire, out of my own do good be good nature. All I felt was the hunger, wanting my fill of everything she has to offer. I wanted to feel Carter's pulse beneath my teeth as they tore through the skin, relieving the aching need to feast upon her divine elixir. I wanted to have my wicked way with her, having nothing or no one to restrain me. I was so close, yet I held back. I came back to myself knowing I truly do not wish to bring the girl harm. I realize there's another thing I desire to have: Her heart.

Annabelle had told me of the overtaking power of the human bond. It is as if every part of you is on fire for that person, the pull too great to ignore. You can sense them much quicker than a normal human, their blood becoming your ultimate strength as well as your worst weakness. However it is not only their life force that you crave. You also crave them in the most personal and intimate of ways. Your desire for their love and devotion can quickly become an insatiable lust for sex. It can be so intense that when both the blood and physical lust become one, it is rare for a vampire to control their primal instinct to kill. I experienced this with my first love, something that is heavily boring upon my mind with Carter.

I know I am being completely careless, putting another human's life at stake because I cannot bear to rid myself of them. I should have never stayed after school today. Yet after the events in the cafeteria, Carter's blood and being sang to me more than ever. But she isn't the real problem and I sure as hell know it. As I told Carter to leave me alone, I couldn't even keep myself away from her. Despite my lust for the human I want to protect her; yet I can't protect her from me. Thank God I got out of the hallway in time before the opportunity to drain her became too irresistible to deny myself of it. I now lean my head against the house door outside, trying to process all that has occurred within the span of three days.

"Liza you cannot allow this to go any further. She is one of warmth, innocence, a human. You are one of darkness, dangerous, a vampire."