Boring ba ako?
Sa panahon ngayon, wala ng halaga ang sex, ang first kiss, first holding hands at lahat ng first. Hindi na din mahalaga kung tama ba o maling tao ang karelasyon mo.
Napag-iwanan na nga ba ako ng panahon? Am I too stuck in the past, in my beliefs that it makes me a boring person?
"It's snowing!" Alyssa got off the bed to stand close to the window. "Do you feel like going out?"
"Sure."
Alyssa smiled. She offered her hand kaya napatingin ako sa kamay niya. We frequently touching or holding each other hand for the past few hours.
I feel comfortable doing things with Alyssa. No questions, kasi wala namang malisya, babae kami pareho and I know that she's just a friend.
"Oooh, this is beautiful." Sabi niya once we step outside. "I love cold. I was born here on winter, then we went to Italy. Kaya every time na nag snow, lumalabas talaga ako. I love playing outside with mom and dad. Pero when I grew up, they just stopped playing with me."
"Don't you have siblings to play with you?"
She sighed. "I have older brother and an older sister, pero, they started working at a young age din. Kaya ayun! Ako nalang talaga on my own." Sagot naman niya at saka inihipan ang kamay niya. She put them on my cheeks. "Your nose is turning red, you must be freezing."
"Hindi naman. I mean, it's not that cold."
"Good thing you are wearing a warm jacket."
"Thank you." I whispered.
I don't even know why I am thankful at the moment.
We walked down the path going to the park. Snow was falling from the sky. Wala ding tao sa park kaya parang kami lang dalawa.
People were hiding in their comforters when it's snowing.
I kicked snow with my boots, and Alyssa was just walking beside me, she was smiling.
"Am I a boring person?" I might as well ask her what she thinks about me after what happened. "We talked about sex after what happened that night. I wanted to know if you think it's weird that I stopped Louis."
"As I said, you deserve someone who respect your beliefs." She looked at me. "If nasabi kong sex lang yun, that's because I was raised differently. I grew up in a City where everyone is trying to loose their virginity at a young age, than keeping it till they find the right person."
"I'm just wondering..."
"I'm sorry if feel mo jinudge kita. But trust me, I don't think you are boring. Confuse pa nga ako eh."
"Confuse?"
"Yes. Kasi, religious ka, and yet some of your actions is against some in the bible. If religious ka talaga, dapat hindi ka nagba-bar. You should not swear, letting me..."
I put my hands up to stop her. "You need to stop there." I shook my head in amusement. "Yan naman yung general na iniisip ng tao pag nakarinig ng religious na word. Stereotypical."
"Well, my brother don't drink."
I raised an eye brow. "Good for him! I can't really say no to alcohol when it's being serve. Tsaka, wala namang masama if I drink occasionally?"
Alyssa shrugged. She kneeled and picked ice on the ground. Bumuo siya ng bola, she looked up and gave it to me.
"I thought you were as white as snow. So white, so clean."
"I can be a snow ball." Sagot ko naman. "How would you say na malinis yan? Parang ako, hindi dahil religious ako, malinis na."
"You are not really serious about..."
"I am serious when it comes to my religion and beliefs. But no one is perfect, everyone can make mistake. I did lots since I came here."
Mas lumakas pa ang snow. Alyssa stand up and we were standing face to face.
"So, what's in your bucket list?" I asked looking straight in her eyes. I could see my breathe through the freezing wind. "Maybe I could help?"
And maybe, changing a topic would be a good idea.
She smiled. "It's fine." Her eyes darted behind me. "You don't need to do things that you don't like just to prove that you are not boring."
"I still wanted to help."
Tumingin siya sa kalangitan. I did the same, mimicking her, but the only difference was that, she was trying to catch a snow with her mouth.
"One of my list is to kiss someone in nowhere while the snow is falling."
Nag katinginan kami.
Napailing-iling siya. Unti-unting sumilay ang ngiti sa labi ko. I pushed her slightly making her blush. Tumingin siya sa paligid, she removed her gloves and before I could even speak, she was already holding my face.
"No regrets?"
"Just kiss me already!"
We shared a kiss and the snow seemed to slow down.
A giggle escaped my lips once our lips parted. It was just a brief kiss but I felt everything from it. I actually wanted to laugh and cry all at once.
"That escalated quickly!"
"It was just a kiss." I told Ella as I glanced behind me. "Plus, I am just helping to complete her bucket list."
"Helping? But the blush on your face is telling me different things!"
I groaned. "I was outside, in a freezing weather Ella! Mamumula talaga ako!"
"Eh? I doubt that's because of the snow."
"Bahala ka. Basta, Alyssa is just a friend and I am just a good samaritan who is helping a friend!"
"That is fine, Dennise! Tanggap naman ang same sex dito. Tanggap kita."
"Bwisit ka!" Sagot ko sa biro niya.
Ella laughed, at nadala na din ako. I should not take jokes seriously. Nag jojoke lang naman ang best friend ko.
"Ready ka na ba sa gala? Did you tell your parents?"
"I haven't. Is it necessary tho?"
"Yes! Gala nga diba? Everyone will be there. It is not just a party..."
"I know! Pero, the thing is, my Mother don't know what happened between me and Louis!"
"You don't need to tell them." Kaagad niyang sagot. "I knew you are worried about that! Geez, Dennise, you don't need to tell everything to your mom."
"I don't lie."
"Yes you do!"
"Not to my mom!" I said glaring at her. "At least not to her..."
I believed hindi naman ako nag lalie sa mom ko. There are things that I needed to keep private, at hindi naman lahat ng bagay kailangan kong sabihin sakanya.
Alyssa for example.
Tumingin ako sa likuran ko, she was also staring at me. She winked to my direction making me smile.
She's the only one who makes me feel like Im not boring person, I will do anything to keep her.
