Can't Let You Go || JJK [EDITING]

Chapter 40

My bottom lip started to quiver and my hand uncontrollably trembled out of fear. He can't force me to marry him, right? I didn't want to spend my life with a psychopath who couldn't tolerate anything at all! Tears escaped my eyes as I threw my hands to cover my salty face. Noticing me crying, he stood up from his position, pulled me from my waist to stand up and seated himself to place me on his lap.

"Sshhhht, don't cry, baby. I know what's best for you, for both of us." He planted kissed on my arm and shoulder as he rubbed my thigh. It just made me more distressing than I already was, especially after hearing what he rather stated than asked.
"I-I don't want to... m-marry..., please..." I sobbed, tightly clutching on my dress, hoping he would listen to my pleads. He shook his head and smiled adoringly at me as he gently grabbed my chin to face him. He wiped off the salty liquid and cupped my ruined face with his cold hand.

"Oh, baby, you know you're mine, right? I can do whatever I want with you whether it's whipping until you bleed or giving you the pleasure of the world in bed." One if his hand was placed on my thighs, going every second closer to my private part. Not knowing what to do, I panicked because of his outrageous actions. I placed my hand on top of his and smiled artificially at him, averting his attention towards my act.
"I know I-I'm yours b-but I need some t-time." I stuttered out, without trying to let a sob interrupt my sentence. His eyes darkened as annoyance lingered in those dark brown gleamy orbs.
"You know I don't like buts and no's, right? If you don't want another slap, you'll better erase that word out of your dictionary, baby." He slightly cocked his head which I noticed was a habit of him. His hand roughly grabbed my wrist and forcefully put the ring around my ring finger.
"It looks so beautiful in your finger, my lovely fiance." He said through gritted teeth as he was giving me a deadly glare. Unknowingly he gripped on my thigh, making me wince of pain. I wiggled a bit under his tight lock until he noticed what he was doing. He never acts like that.
"Now, you put this ring around my finger." He showed me another ring with a small diamond in the middle of it. With shaking hand I grabbed the ring with my index and thumb and slid it on his ring finger.

"Oh, I also have another surprise for you. Since you're crying maybe it will cheer you up?!" He tapped on my thigh to make my stand and grabbed my hand to lead the way. He pulled me upstairs with him and he made his way towards our shared bedroom. He signalled me to open the door as excitement glowed in his eyes. Confused, I made contact with the doorknob with shaking hands, still shocked by the recent events. I stepped in only to see out bed decorated with red petal flowers on the white sheet with a red cheetah pattern. There was a bucket filled with ice cubes with red wine in it and a box of Belgian chocolate next to it on the bedside table.

It horrified me even more than the words he just stated to me minutes ago. I felt my knees getting weak and leant on the door for support. He walked up to me and wrapped his arms around my frightened form and kissed my cheek.
"I'm nervous too, y/n." He leant forward to connect our foreheads with each other.
"Don't worry, I'll be gentle." He rubbed my arms in a circular motion. A nauseous feeling churned in my stomach, I couldn't digest his horrendous words.
"But first we'll eat! We can't have sex on a empty stomach, right?"

The hot steam was coming out of the untouched spaghetti in front of me as I tightly clutched on the fork because I just lost my appetite by what he just showed and told me. I just stared at the food thinking if I should do something or adjust myself...

No. Even if I wanted, I couldn't.

His dark brown eyes were signing me to eat. He did it very often that was why I knew what he meant.
"It's too hot. I'll eat when it's cooled down." I lied, tightening the grip around the fork which I held under the table.

He opened his mouth to say something but pressed his lips again together. It was like he was having a mental battle with himself whether he should say it or not.
"Since we are getting married soon I was just thinking about having kids, like start a family?Wouldn't that be nice?" He said tensely as he twirled the fork around the red tainted strings on his plate. He was waiting impatiently for me to answer but he left me dumbfounded. I wasn't ready to have any kids, not with him. As if he could read my mind he spoke again.
"I know you're not ready. I can wait a couples of years." A small reassuring smile tugged on his lips.