Our Endless Love

Chapter 45: Changing Faces

May 13, 1992
Michael's POV

I peered into the mirror, framing pure dissatisfaction. My face got lighter with each passing day, and the surgeries I've had are making it harder to look at myself. I'm reminded of how ugly I look by the media constantly, as if I didn't already know that. Nicole always expresses to me her deep love for me, and how beautiful I am.

I just don't see it. I don't get what the world thinks. Why do they have to harass me constantly? Why do my fans still keep coming? I sighed in sadness. I don't understand what Nicole finds attractive about me. "Stop that shit this instant." Nicole's voice came into my left ear as her arms enveloped around me. "You're a gorgeous person, Michael Jackson. I don't understand your mentality against yourself."

I turned around to see her beautiful face, and her scared features. "Sometimes I'm scared, Michael. I wish you could see the beauty I see in you. I don't want to see you so ashamed of yourself, and I don't want you doing anything that could have a lasting impact on your life. Baby, you're an incredible person. And you're breathtaking. I've never been more attracted to you than I am now. I think my husband is the sexiest, most giving person this world has ever seen." She expressed.

"I appreciate that. But, I know what my reality is. I hate the way I look. Why did I have to be born like that? Why is this happening? I look like a ghost. How can you find me attractive?" I stated, trying to avoid eye contact with her.

"Michael Joseph Jackson. You look at me right now." She commanded. I peered into her soulful eyes. "I loved you from the moment I met you. You were somebody special to me, but I couldn't place my finger on it. I've loved you for the eleven years I committed my life to the man I love more than anything. And I've loved my best friend even longer than that. I wouldn't give my life to somebody I wasn't attracted to. I crave you. God, how I crave you." Nicole stood with her body pressed against mine, her face not even three inches from mine. "I've never been in love, Michael. I never was in with anybody until I got you. You're my velocity, damn it. You keep me going. I wouldn't raise those three beautiful children with anyone else. They are our creations, and they are the most beautiful children I've ever seen."

"They have your genetics, you know." I joked lightly,

"Nah, Corey looks exactly like his daddy. Those eyes don't come from me. Those soulful brown eyes that remind me of you so much. You give this world everything, and if they can't appreciate you, then fuck 'em. They don't deserve you, or your genuine love. This world is ruined, but you sure aren't." Nicole asserted. "Now come and enjoy your life with your beautiful children. Your breathtaking wife says so."

I chuckled and followed her out of our bedroom. I swear this woman can make me feel better just by being there. I thank the lord above for her everyday. "Mom please let me go to this party tonight! This is my reputation at stake!" Sierra dragged on. Nicole ignored her, and continued making the kids some peanut butter sandwiches.

"What's this about a party?" I questioned.

"Your daughter is harassing me about a damn party. Sierra, no! I know damn well there will be alcohol. I'm not having you around that shit, and if you sneak out, your ass is grass. I've never whooped you, but I won't hesitate." Nicole explained, glaring at our visibly upset daughter.

"Okay baby, lets relax. No need to get upset." I tried to calm her down. Nicole rolled her eyes, and went to cut some strawberries. DJ is still at that age where huge things pose a choking hazard, and that boy loves to stuff his face.

"She needs to take no for an answer, and stick to it!" Nicole bellowed, looking more pissed by the minute.

"It would be nice if you put my needs before your own." Sierra challenged. Nicole slammed down her knife, startling everyone in the dining room. She turned around, and glared at her daughter.

"I've never put my needs before any of my children. You need to rethink that before you say somethin' stupid. I'm your mother, and I deserve to be treated as such." She demanded.

Oh great, it's getting into that phase.

----

Nicole placed her earrings on the vanity, and started brushing her hair. "Michael, I just don't understand what's getting into our daughter. This afternoon, she approached me and started acting like a self entitled brat. Is this for her to get attention, or is it something else?" She sighed.

"Baby, she's a fifteen year old hormonal teenage girl with tons of self pride. She's the mirror of you at that age." I chuckled.

"I had respect for my mother." Nicole corrected me. "I'm just ready for bed. Good night, Michael." She kissed my forehead, and buried her face into her pillow. I sighed.

"Good night, Nicole." I said, getting comfortable myself.