"I got rejected, world."
"How to forget when you gave me so much to remember?"
Now the only thing she can say was, "I'm okay." .
Even when she know she isn't.
Whoever who asks, she'll say "I'm fine.", "I'm okay.", "I got better.", "I felt better." .
But nope.
She isn't feeling any better.
"I'm not okay."
It was hell for her the day when she got rejected.
She had her period when she got rejected.
What's more to say it's the first day.
She had deadlines to meet when she got rejected.
Supervisor, clients, colleagues' mood swings and all.
She lost her appetite when she got rejected.
She needs someone to talk to.
But who's there for her?
"Let's not be awkward." He said.
But she wasn't even being awkward.
Maybe to him.
But she was doing fine.
Until he said to try to be like how they were before.
And of course,
It broke her.
She knew he felt weird, knowing that someone he has (always) chat with has feelings for him.
And that someone isn't a real gorgeous girl.
That someone isn't a cutie nor a hottie.
But that someone is someone who's below average looking.
That someone has got her heart broken just six months ago.
And most importantly,
That someone has got depression.
She felt sorry for liking him.
And confessing to him.
Making him feel weird and all.
It really crushed her into pieces.
She thought him telling her what to expect was actually a hint that she's gonna get accepted (when she actually thought she's destined to be alone for this life) and be another couple in the clique.
But no.
She forgot the fact that he was a little tipsy when he replied.
A message which led her to this unplanned confession, the I-will-never-confess confession broke everything.
"So you do like me?" He replied.
For the whole of day one and day two,
She was looking for ways to forget about him.
She searched online for ways to overcome rejection.
Though this is her second time.
But it felt different for some reasons.
And she have yet to figure out why is that so.
She called her friend while crying, after she got rejected.
She tried to make herself sound like she's okay and coping well with the rejection.
But she failed.
Emotions took over and she cried even harder.
No matter how prepared she was for the second rejection, it still broke her down.
She knows it wouldn't be easy for her to walk out of this heartbreak alone, but she had no choice.
But to leave.
She can no longer rely on him anymore.
He's no longer the same guy she knew.
He became more distant now that he knew about her feelings towards him.
She told herself this isn't a big deal since she went through it before.
She told herself that it'll heal as time passes.
But it still hurts no matter how long it has passed.
