Giving Love Another Chance

Chapter 10

 

Guilty. That’s what I have been feeling from the moment I stormed out of Mr. Collin’s office. It was true that I was fuming with anger when I reached my office room and slumped in my chair. But after taking a few breaths to calm down and get my head together, it slowly dawned on me how much my words could have hurt him. I didn’t have any right to vent my anger at him for something he was not responsible for. I felt like a pathetic mess, and I slapped my forehead in irritation. I was never the kind of person who liked to hurt people, and then sit back and relax. No, I was way better than that.

I angrily crumpled the coffee cup in my hands before tossing it into the trash bin. I got up from my chair hastily; I was determined to make things right between us.  But a beep sound from my laptop notifying the arrival of a new email stopped me. I opened my outlook and stared at it with a scowl; a new conference call meeting request with the Morgan Lee team based in Chicago. I groaned when I noticed the participants list; only me and Ryan from the current team, Keith Watson, our delivery manager and a few other people whose name didn’t ring any bells. I heaved a heavy and irritated sigh before picking up the VoIP and pressed the dial in number and PIN to enter the meeting.

------------------

Since it was Monday, the day had been extremely busy and tiring with a large work load. There was a glitch in one of the applications that had been upgraded on Saturday, and we had to apply an emergency fix to correct the issue. I had several meetings with various teams concerning the issue, and we decided to roll over the change, and carry out the upgrades on the coming weekend with the required changes. When Ryan arranged a meeting with the team to discuss on the issue, we both avoided looking at each other. He was also the first one to leave the room once the meeting dispersed, giving me no room to apologize for my behavior.

Throughout the day, he avoided me, but I didn’t miss his cold attitude to everyone, and sometimes I noticed him shooting glances at my direction. I didn’t know if he was angry or concerned, but he didn’t bother to come and talk to me anymore. I was not proud of myself with the way I rejected his offer to join them for dinner, and I was dying to fix things between us. To make my day worse, he scheduled too many meetings; he either enjoyed torturing me or he was in a hurry to finish all the important work in one day. I even had a meeting with Greg and Ryan about Greg taking over my role. Greg was elated with the news whereas Ryan had an impassive face. All he told me was to start with the training at the earliest, but not before next week.  Once the meeting was over, he asked me to leave, but made Greg stay as he wanted to have a quick word with the guy. I didn’t know what went inside his office after I left, but when Greg came out of Ryan’s office, his face was pale, and my lips quirked up in a small smile. ‘Oh Ryan, why don’t you let me fight my battles,’ I mused, shaking my head in amusement.

It was plain torture to attend each meeting with a heavy heart, especially during the time I had to brief the team about the upcoming changes in the team- structure. I deliberately avoided looking at him, but I could feel his glance fixed on me during the entire time, making me feel self conscious. Our eyes met once and he held my gaze for what seemed like an eternity, but in reality it was only a few seconds. My breathing hitched when I noticed the intensity in his clouded eyes, and I immediately looked away, unable to take it anymore. I let out a relieved sigh when he left in the middle of the meeting, to receive an important call. And thankfully, he didn’t return to attend the rest of the meeting.