Bananinjasss

Bananas And Ninjas

Shit's pov
Sunlight filtered through the blinds of our room as the sun beamed at me!
I was so chirpy this morning!
Just fucking kidding!
Cancerous UV rays attacked my eyes t minutes earlier and and i had to crawl out of the arms of my love (my bed). And it is still morning! Just not chirpy and poetic! I shift my bed at all angles I know and yet this sun of a bitch (yes! Sun) blinds me every morning! I might have a catarct in a day or two! I look over at sans and sharku snoring and drooling and despise them instantly! Blessed they are that sun of a bitch has a liking for them!

Usually sharku cooks for us! We chop veggies and boil noodles and make coffee! But sharku is skilled! She handles the biggest of tyrannies every morning! This morning! It wont happen! I will make both my best friends feel loved!
Yes! I will cook today!
I will make banana custard!
So here I am!
With a bowl and a table spoon!
Go shit go ringing in my ears!!
I put custard powder
And sugar
And milk
And water
And egg shells
And salt
And baking soda
And Ambuja cement
And fevicol
And Bread
And socks
And usha fans
And bitten nails
Yumm! Extra crispy
And paper
And apsara pencils
(No not for good handwriting)
And Alia Bhatt!
No I dont cook her!
I just put a photo of her!
I stir and stir and stir even more..
Then I add the secret to Shit's banana custard!
Yeah
Heard me right!
Big reveal!!!!
Bananaaaas!
There you go!
I put the paste in a mixer and mix it!
And for complimentary essence...
I spray kama sutra (deo) in all our bowls!
They are going to be so proud of me today..
So damn proud!
I take the custard in a tray and make my way to our room.
There I see sans and sharku curled up in their blankets. This is so unfair! Sun of a bitch has been way too bitchy today! How dare sun of a bitch sparkle and dance and twerk and glitter and shit in my face and let rest of the world sleep in peace!
Okay bitch! Guess what! If you are sun of a bitch I am shittier than shit can ever be
(Please notice shitty narcissism)
I make a shitty move and start yelling
Aaaaabaaaabaaaaabuuuuuuubababababaawaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaababeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeguuuuuuuiiiiiiiiiiiyayayayayayayayaaaaaaaaa
On cue, Sans wakes up and shoots me a sinister glare!
Sans : What's up with you? This is like 12 pm! This is my morning dude!
Sharku mumbles in her sleep.
Sharku : I dont want to miss periodicals! Iye kandy is the invigilator today!
Sans : They were @ 9 remember?
Sharku's eyes shoot open.
Sharku : Okay so if anybody asks you why Sharku did not show up be good room mates and testify that an anaconda tackled shit in sleep and I was cutting it open!
Sans : okay cool! Never mind! Its a great excuse!
Shit : the ananconda had a very bad breath. Does this make it sound more authentic?
Sharku : not bad! Ughh! I need ti cook now. I will get later than late can ever be today.
Sans : you never make it before 2 anyway. This happens when you are nocturnal!
Sharku : *eye roll*
Shit : I guess you might make it before 2 today. I cooked us food.
Sans : I made us babies!
Shit : No. I really cooked food!
Sharku : Are you implying sans can't really make babies?
Shit : Wether she can is out of my jurisdiction but I really made us custard! Banana custard!
Sharku : I dont want to sound discouraging but did you put custard and milk and sugar and bananas in it!
Shit : yes I did!
Sans takes a spoonful of it.
Sans: This is heavenly. It has great texture.
Shit : Really *sparkling eyes*
Sans : No
Shit :  *eye roll*
Sharku : But it really has one hell of a crispy gooey texture. Its fine. It can do for just one morning.

Author
The girls finish their bowls quick an easy. As sharku heads for the shower she feels dizzy. She gets into the tub but loses conciousness real quick and water fills up her lungs!
Meanwhile... Sans prepares herself a toast. She tries to fix up a socket but passes out dizzy with her pinky finger stuck in a socket in a closed circuit!
Shit sits on a shitpot lazily looking at the city veiw out of the glass panel in the other bathroom! Her head starts spinning and she falls face flat on the ground, bounces back on the pot and hits her head!
But strangely.. lungs soaked in water do not hinder Sharku's breathing! Sparks do not fire up sans' ass and shit pot doesn't break shit's face. They have strange powers. By the grace of bananas they have become.
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Bananinjas 😬