Internet Friends ›› n.h

Five

Our hug was sadly cut far to short as the door burst open not to reveal thousands of fans, but one boy with brown tousled long hair.

"Oh shit sorry Ni but Paul says we have to go!" The boy exclaims looking outside then back at Niall.

"Can Kaylee come Lou?" The boy, who clearly must be Louis Tomlinson, nods and rushes back outside.

I am literally still trying to process what happened and before I know it Niall's hand is entangled in mine and he's dragging me out of the class.

Though don't get me wrong, Im not complaining.

Somehow we got to their tour bus without being malled by people, and I realized it was probably because we were at the Uni and even fangirls have to go to class. Though that means Niall and I were in the auditorium for over an hour and it definitely did not feel that way.

Once on the bus Niall leads me to the east side of the bus, to "his room" or little bunk bed room with a curtain. Fancy set up they got here for being multi millionaires.

"Kayls I think we should talk," Niall tells me as he sits down on his bed.

I nod, "I think that would be good," I whisper finally getting up the courage to speak.

"So I'm sure you already know what I'm going to ask, but why'd you do it Kaylee?" He asks the question I've been dreading, even though I accepted that I was ready to talk.

"This may take a while so get comfortable," I start off, and no I'm not stalling, "Around 3 years ago, when your management started trying to convince you to stop talking to me, and we started talking less, I started to tell Myself that You didn't want to talk to me. When I was making the decision to stop talking to you I was convincing myself, that I was helping you and I know how ridiculous thats sounds, I wish I could take it back. God how I wish I could take it back, id give anything. But I cant and I'm so sorry Niall I cant change what I did, I missed out on so much and I cant get it back."

By the end of my explanation I'm in tears once again, and I am so so glad I wasn't wearing eye make up today. Niall is staring at me blankly clearly trying to soak it all in which is very understandable. I cant say I don't know the feeling, after everything thats happened its been a few days and Im still trying to soak it in.

"I just... I don't- I cant... I still don't understand why you ran from me?" He asks, "What are you afraid of?

You.

"Nothing," I lie bluntly through my teeth.

He shakes his head, and I open my mouth to say something but quickly close it once again into a thin line.

"Why did you want to find me so badly?" I ask not being able to hold it in anymore.

"I don't know," he answers honestly, "I guess I just needed to know, like I couldn't live the rest of my life in peace with this un answered question always haunting me, ya know?"

So you never did care about me?

Of course not.

Your not helping.

Im not trying to.

I hate you.

Well I'm you so you hate yourself.

Shut up.

"And? Are you satisfied with your answer?" I ask him my voice slightly shaking.

"I don't know, I still need to process this, but I have an answer and thats all that matter."

"So what happens now?" I ask the only question thats obviously left to ask.

He takes a deep breath, kind of like I did before, then says, "I leave, I continue with my life, you continue yours," he states simply.

That was all it took for my heart to literally shatter inside my chest, I could feel each piece of it slowly crumbling in my chest and the ache was like nothing before.

"Besides today was our last day in New York," He adds, "we move onto Detroit tomorrow."

This day just keeps getting better and better, and as much as I love the sound of his heavenly accent, Niall really needs to stop talking.

Clearly the sadness is clear on my face as Niall asks, "Whats wrong you look upset?"

"No, Im fine although I just got one of my best friends back and now apparently they are leaving again!" I shout a bit too harshly, but I don't regret it one bit.

"I thought this is what you wanted!" He shouts back, tears brim to my eyes.

"Yes Niall this is exactly what I fucking want! to get my best friend back them have him ripped away again!" I scream, not remembering if anyone else is in the bus, but honestly not caring at the moment.

"Best friend? Is that what you call suddenly cutting ties with someone and hiding from them for 3 years? 3 god damn years Kaylee!" He shouts back, and I can actually feel the pain laced in his voice.

"I already said I was sorry Niall!" I spit.

"Sorry? Your fucking sorry Kaylee? Im sorry too, for ever wasting my time on you when you were never worth it!" He growls at me, though his face doesn't look angry he looks just as heart broken as Im feeling.

"Then you shouldn't have! Clearly we'd both be a lot better off," I hiss at him, tears falling from my eyes, before turing and storming out of the bus.

I cant get away from him fast enough and something tells me that this is gonna take even longer to get over. Hell its gonna take a few days to process everything, and I mean everything that happened.

Again here I am running away from Niall, running away from my problems, tears steaming down my face so much that I don't even bother wiping them away.

The only difference is this time, I know exactly where I'm going.

-

Yay another update hehe :)

But awe kiall is fighting :'(

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