Where Is He? (Harry Potter Fanfic)

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!I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER!
Before reading, go back and reread my first chapter. I changed a few things.

??? pov

I was sitting on my bed (if you could call it that) and was wondering why everyone was ignoring my existence. Did they think I was a liar? That I killed him? Well I don't deny not minding seeing him die. It was a spectacular view seeing the life leave his eyes in an instant. Just seeing the drastic change made adrenaline rush through my veins. Thinking of it now also did. Oh how I would love to hold that much power over someone; to be able to make the lights vanish in an instant. A small shiver ran through my body. I know I should be disturbed by my thoughts but oddly enough; I'm not. I haven't for awhile.

But that is not the point; the point is that I didn't kill him. I wouldn't have killed him. I had no reason to. Too much to loose. More shivers ran down my back. Too much would just be thrown through the window by killing anyone. I would kill but it's not worth the risk; or at least it wasn't. That seems to have vanished with people thinking that I possibly killed him. But why would they think I did that deed? What do they think I would gain by doing that? I, their oh-so precious little savior of the light, Harry Potter. Are they that blinded by their fear and disbelief that Lord Voldemort could come back? That they say Diggory's death was a "tragic accident?" Or better yet; that it was me? Was I truly just that? A scape goat for their fear? What where they going to do next? Try to imprison me? Then when they realized I was right... what then? Come find and beg me for forgiveness and expect me to solve all their problems? If that was the case I would rather die or join Voldemort than be their Savior. I started to feel cold inside.

And Dumbledore! He just pushed me aside after that and seemed to treat me like a lunatic! He acted like he believed me but I saw it in his eyes, he saw me as a mad man! He didn't even say much on Cedric's death or how he died. Probably wanted to keep his image. Like he's done a good job at that anyways.

My thoughts seemed to consume me. Eating me peice by peice. Not knowing; why couldn't I just know? Knowledge: I need it. That is the one thing I and others have neglected to teach me. Well not Hermione but I didn't listen. Oh how I wish I had. And right now I can't really do much. Why do I stay in this hell hole anyways? I could just leave. Why not?

I burst into numerous shivers an odd coldness settling into my being. Why the hell am I getting cold?! I was sweating my butt off not too long ago! Then pain, it was like my bones where melting and then freezing back into place, slightly altered from what they used to be. It seemed to last forever. The cold pain seeming to never leave my body. After awhile the pain seemed to leave. But the cold seemed to stay and a numbness that seemed to replace the pain. I lay down, heaving deep breaths. I no longer feel like myself. Physically and mentally. I feel thinner than I was. I raise my hands up near my face. My skin looks ghostishly white and I feel a bit longer; or taller if you want to say that.

I hear a knock on my window. Turning, I see an owl that I don't recognize. Getting up to walking to the window, I peer out at the owl. Wonder: I wonder if this is all just a dream. No one most likely has any reason to write me anymore; except disown ever knowing me. Or better yet, a warrent for my expulsion from Hogwarts and my arrest. Who knows, they might be preparing to send me to the insane section of St. Mungos. They could also know of what just happened; but that can't be.

There is another impatient knock at the window from the owl outside. I make up my mind and open the window. The bird flys in and lands on my desk, holding out its leg for it's burden to be taken. I hesitate, unsure what the letter might contain. Could someone have sent a curse? Maybe it's Ron and Hermione saying they're disgusted that they ever laid eyes on me. Not that I would be surprised. If they found out I found it interesting and even exciting to see someone's life dwindled in front of my very eyes, they would turn on me before I could even raise my own wand.