Greed and Despond (Ban x Sin!Reader)

37

"Heeeey everyone~" Ban's drunken voice rang out through the bar. I couldn't really judge, because I was dead drunk too, just as everyone else was, but his intoxication was slightly more obvious than everyone else's. We had decided to celebrate Gowther's return to the team, and, like any other sane group of criminals, we decided to get drunk. Very drunk. "Guess what~! Gowther decided who King was becaus of his body odor!"

He snorted in laughter, wrapping an arm around King's neck as he did so. Both of their faces were flushed red in drunkenness, just as Diane and mine's were. I liked to think I held my alcohol a little bit better than them, so my cheeks were slightly less so.

"Body odor?" Diane questioned, leaning in to sniff King. In my drunken state, I didn't see a problem with it, so I joined in. Ban, Ellie, Hawk, Diane, and I all had our noses close to the small boy, inhaling his scent. He smelled like a bouquet of fresh-picked flowers, along with various other forms of vegetation. It was rather comforting.

"You smell like flowers," I hummed, continuing to inhale his scent.

"Super sweet~" Ban purred.

"Ugh, I hate flowers," Hawk huffed, still sniffing.

"It's so nice!" Diane giggled.

"S-stop it you guys! If you make me more nervous, I'll- " his sentence was cut off by his body changing form, into his fat one. My nose scrunched up.

"You smell like sweat now," I frowned.

"It's got this weird, musty stink," Ban agreed.

"It's nostalgic!" Hawk shouted.

"Ew..." Diane muttered.

"You guys are only saying that because that's how you'd expect this body to smell!" King shouted, his tubby cheeks flushed bright red in intoxication and embarrassment.

"Eh, don't worry about it~" Ban laughed in a sing-songy voice. King huffed, turning to face Gowther.

"Why just me?!" He screeched, demanding the Goat Sin.

"Did I do something wrong?" Gowther asked in response.

"Yeah, you caused all of this!!" He shrieked, stomping his feet. "Tell is something unbearable about everybody else!"

"I understand," the magenta-haired man said in response, and a small shard of light shot into  Diane's neck. She looked completely unaffected by it. He turned to her. "Diane, you lie to us about your height by saying you are twenty-nine feet when in actuality you are slightly taller than thirty." Her face exploded into a bright red, her hands clutching her cheeks as she stared down at Gowther in disbelief. He continued, "Furthermore, your weight is-"

Diane shrieked, pounding her fist down atop the Sin. She then began repeating the action, barraging his body with her large fists.

"AAAGH! STUPID, STUPID, STUPID GOWTHER! HOW COULD YOU?! YOU CAN'T JUST REVEAL A LADY'S SECRET LIKE THAT!"

"Hah? Why the hell does that matter?" Ban asked curiously, "A foot doesn't mean anything- especially when you're as tall as she is."

"It's a girl thing," I sighed, awkwardly shifting my gaze away, thinking about how I overestimated my height a little bit, since I was so short- especially in terms of the Sins.

"I dun get it," He slurred, shrugging as he took another gulp from his drink. Another light dart shot out, this time connecting with Ban's neck. Gowther had come out relatively unscathed, only his glasses were slightly crooked and mangled- probably broken. He looked at Ban as Diane pouted from the sidelines.