just like old times

to you, from me

dear you, 1/23/2019

you will never stop making my heart beat

and my skin will always start to heat

when i think about you

i have knots in my stomach from hurting you

my throat gets cold and dry when i can't find the right

words to fix my mistakes

of course i would never stop trying,

you are my utmost reason

you make me feel like betraying you

ends with treason

i never wanted to be the one who makes tears fall

from your eyes rather than daises

if i could hold you right now,

i would hum our song in your ear

and tell you how much you really mean to me

i'd take you to the spot in my town

only (now you) and i know about

i thought i had hit rock bottom

and then the floors gave out

you are helping me rebuild

you are the reason my new home won't have doors

or windows

you will always hold the key to my existence

you will always live with that weight on your shoulders

but the fact that you are willing

is what truly makes me want to stay

if crying until my skin is so soggy you could take a bite out of it

means i get to stay with you the rest

of my life

then taste me with everything you have in you

because you are the first person i have ever truly

built a future around

with every suicide note i have ever wrote

your name was at the top of my "i'm sorry" list

with every poem i write

with the word moon in it,

you are always my meaning behind personifying the sun

with every sad day you have, i will make sure you

have a great one to even it out

i will hold your hand

when there is a drought in my mouth

and if you'll let me, i'll be your end of all things

and, i am letting you, be the start of my new beginning.