Sandcastles

Chapter Twenty-Five

Ben and Helen (Dylan O'Brien and Shailene Woodley) because this chapter 😶

Helen refused to show up to school the whole rest of the week. Ben went over to her house every single day last week and he was even there over the weekend. Today marks a week since Tiffany exposed Helen's secret to everyone that was at gym that day. Word travels through Collins Creek High School very fast, so I'm sure everyone has found out by now. When I step out of the car into the school parking lot this morning, I'm a little surprised and quite nervous when I see Helen's car parked in its usual spot. Ben immediately goes over to talk to her. This afternoon she has a doctor's appointment where they should tell her if it is a boy or a girl.

I glance over to Alexander's truck and see him leaning against it, staring at me. My eyes flutter to the ground but when I look back up, he's still staring at me. I ignore it and walk up towards the stone steps of the school.

I get to my locker and dig out my geometry books. There's still a few minutes before the class starts but I decide to go in anyways. I go in, taking my desk and staring up at the ceiling. John Tyler walks in and takes the desk next to me. Ben comes in shortly and takes his desk near the front.

The bells ring and more students walk in. I don't pay attention the whole class and basically just stare at the ground. I forgot to drink coffee this morning so I'm terribly tired.

Drama class is next so I take my notebooks and head to the room. Mrs. Samuels greets me with a huge smile when I walk in the room and I take my usual desk by Troy. Alexander has now reserved my old seat for Tiffany every day. Not that I would sit there anyways.

Troy has his beanie tucked over the earbuds that are in his ears to hide it from Mrs. Samuels. It won't be easy to hide when the bell rings and the room goes silent, because his music has to be turned up all the way. He taps his pencil on the desk to the beat of the music and keeps his stare straight ahead.

The bell rings, shattering through the empty halls and echoing through the room. Mrs. Samuels closes the door for us to begin class. For the past week, she's had someone new go up each day and read a monologue they picked out. I read mine last Friday, using a monologue from While You Were Sleeping.

"Mr. Ludwig, I believe today is your day." She calls through the room with her sickening smile. Somehow, Troy hears her and gathers his papers together before yanking out his earbuds. He walks to the front of the room, his Converses squeaking on the floor with each step. He forgot to turn his iPod off, for I can still hear music blaring through the headphones now dangling off the desk.

Troy takes his beanie off, ordered by Mrs. Samuels, before flipping through his jumbled papers. He finds the one he wants and makes eye contact with me before clearing his throat and beginning to read.

"I, for one, believe that love itself is nothing but a downward spiral." He begins, only glancing down at the paper in his shaky hands. "I believe, no matter how absurd it sounds, that love is a stupid waste of time. Don't you? I guess not. Why am I talking to you anyways? It's not like you're listening to me; you never did when you were awake. I'm wasting my time. I hate wasting time, which is probably why I hate the idea of love. You know, I woke up one day and thought 'today is the day, I will give love a try'. And you know what happened? You fell into a coma. Nice. So maybe I'm just destined to hate love, to never love, to never be in love. Don't you agree? Do you agree that I should never be in love? Of course not; you're not even listening to me, are you?"

He looks up from his paper and holds it at his side. For some reason, his monologue made me feel uncomfortable and like it was directed at me in some way. He said what it was from, but I wasn't paying attention and didn't listen.