Help Me (danti)

chapter 3

Guess what I'm not dead...... Not yet anyway haha.... I'm sad.
         Anti's POV
I rest my head on my desk. Ugh I hate life. I really wish I could be dead. But of course theses people say they care and they want me to stay. But I bet no one would even notice if was gone. Would they even care? No most likely not. Im snapped out of my depressing thoughts but the teacher shouting at me. I quickly lift my head.
"U-uh yes ma'am" I mutter out in a shy nervous way. I can feel everyone staring at me I can feel their eyes. They feel like cold knifes cutting into my flesh. Oh god stop staring at me please.
"Anti McLaughlin if you're going to nap go to the nurses office" The teacher says in a very annoyed voice.
"Yes ma'am " I say quietly. The kids finally look away from me. That's when I realize that my heart is pounding against my ribcage. I'm breathing very fast as if I just ran a whole block twice. Oh god oh no. Not here not now. They think I'm a freak enough all I need is to cry and hide in my hands. Imagine how much they will laugh at me then. Oh yes how very funny to watch a teen become a ball whimpering and shaking begging not be hurt and for it all to go away, crying violently and uncontrollably and being unable to breathe. Oh yeah that's soooo funny. The only person who probably won't think it's funny is Dark. He probably would be trying to figure out whats going on. I don't think so tho who knows maybe he would maybe he wouldn't. I don't know anymore I really don't. God life is just endless suffering. So much pain. Why do I even come to school in the first place. The teachers dont want me here. My peers don't want me here either. So why do I even bother... Oh yeah Dark... The only person who I can call a friend. Friend that's a nice word with a nice meaning. A friend is there when you need them. They comfort you when you need it. They promise to never leave your side. They promise to make you're alright. But sometimes friend isn't always a nice word. Sometimes you may call someone a friend but they will pretend to be a friend in tell they have you as a little puppet. Their little puppet. They make you do their bidding. Into someone saves you and breaks the strings. I hate being a puppet. One day I'll cut the strings. One day I'll leave this hell hole of a life. Oh that day would be wonderful. But then of course the people how care will be sad and cry over your grave. But it only happens when ever your dead people start to care and they say they love you. But you're already gone. But they always hold their tongue whenever you're living and breathing but they spill their guts whenever you're gone. I feel like my heart is going to break though my ribcage and rip my flesh open tell it pops from my chest. The blood would spray as my body slumps down as people stare in shock trying to figure out what the hell just happened. The cops would come but they wouldn't be able to figure out what happened. Oh dear god I'm majorly fucked up in the head. I need to leave this room. I could run for it or I could make up an excuse. Oh I have an idea. I pick up my pin and drop it off the desk. I lean over reaching for it and I wait. Then I let go falling onto my head I feel blood on my face. I smile before going up to teacher who quickly makes me leave. The whole time I felt Darks eyes on me. His eyes make my cheeks feel warm and I feel so weak and nervous under his gaze. Why?  Why why?  I don't understand!  What is this feeling!? .. Ugh I don't know but this feeling isn't all that nice. Sometimes it makes you feel so happy and other's it makes your heart burn and ache and feel likes it's slowly being ripped in two. Once I snap out of my thoughts I realize I somehow have gotten to the nurses office. I'm so confused. What's going on. I look up. Oh my god Dark carried me here. Wait I don't remember him saying anything or being picked up.
"Anti are you alright?  You passed out " Dark says softly. Wait I passed out?!  What?  I'm so confused. I look up showing my confusion.
"You picked up your pin then suddenly dropped it and passed out landing on the desk. You remained unresponsive. So I had to take you to the nurse" Dark explains. I - oh wait my wrist hurts oh no I think i have been bleeding for my arm and I got so weak without even noticing. Oh no. Oh no oh no oh no. I can't go to the nurse she'll find out. She'll send me away. I try to escape Darks grip on me I can't for some reason I just can't. Wait the world is spinning what's happening. Dark is saying something but I can't hear him in fact it's starting to become to where I can't see him anymore.
" N-no don't leave. Its dark I'm scared " I beg out. Whimpering I start to pass out again. Oh geez I feel so tired. I'm gonna take a small nap now. I start to close my eyes. I see Darks face as he crys out something I can't hear. His mouth moves but no sounds come out or at least no sound I can hear. So tired. So very tired. I close my eyes and let the darkness comfort me and take me far away for a bit. Maybe I'll never wake up. I'll sleep forever. I feel my body fall limp then it's just the endless inky blackness that holds me now.