Angels •°Black and White°•

•°Chapter 2°•

I was sitting outside the Leader's office, waiting for his heavy voice to call me in. I left from the Human Dimension after I searched everywhere for the Demon that had escaped me. My efforts went to no veil since the demon was nowhere to be found. That meant only one thing. 

Failure...

I was playing with the bracelet my mom gave me when I was younger, It was a silver chain decorated by a single also silver feather. I was wearing it to my right wrist, right above my only tattoo. Usual it was forbidden to angels to have a tattoo but I did it anyway, the first time since the incident that I disobeyed the rules. It was a small one anyway, tiny calligraphic laters spelling the words 'Solvit errata'. My mother's last words.

A harsh voice brought me back to reality. It was the master's voice, my father's voice.

''Come in'' he said in his usual strict tone.

The blonde secretary who sat on her office, long nails tapping on her high tech computer, gave me an encouraging smile before turning back to her work. I returned it, although she was longer looking and took a deep breath. Hands sweating and slightly trembling, I got up from where I was sitting and walked into his office.

The room was light lit. Basically, the little light coming from the window was only enough to lit my side of the room, leaving my father's angry face in the dark. On the one side, I was glad that I couldn't see clearly at his disappointed look, on the other side the lack of light made the situation match more intimidating. The furnishings were made of leather and, as usual, undistractable as if they were brand you. Something that seemed impossible since they were decorating the leader's office for years. The walls were painted crimson, decorated by the portraits of previous leader's of the Institute. The single personal item that I could detect was a wooden frame resting on the desk. It was a picture of our family, me, my father and mother, all smiling happily at the camera. I had to be at least seven years old. A lot has changed since then.

''Sit down...'' he said quietly.

 I sat on the leather chair right in front of his desk. Fixing my posture as best as I could I got ready for the outburst that would soon come.

''I-'' I tried to say but his fierce voice easily covered mine.

''Amelia Wilson, Angel of the first guard and the best on your class. I was informed that in your present mission you let a demon escape you'' he said, voice harsh, eying my envelope like he was looking at it for the first time. 

''Can we not do that?'' I said quit bored by the situation. He gave me an angry glare that made me change my attitude. I simply bowed my head and said a quiet  ''Sorry''

Ι did not want my dad to treat me as if I was another student. I knew that having a different treatment from the others was not fair. But it was my dad and in moments like that, I needed him. Not as a leader but as a father. It was my first mission and I had failed, a good scolding was not what I needed right now. But I had a different treatment from the others, a more strict and demanding.

'' You do understand that your failure will cost us a lot right? The demon that managed to escape will inform the others that we found their portal and they will move it again.,'' he said and I hold in a grimace. He wasn't angry that the demons would move the portal, that wasn't a problem at all. I was the problem in the situation. 

''I know...'' I said regardless, head still facing my hands. I just wanted a portal to appear and suck me in, not caring where it would take me.

'' Now, tell me exactly what happened'' he said, all his attention on me.

I tried to explain in detailed all that had happened. From the portal opening sooner than anticipated to me being stuck on the wall. However, I did not mention his last words, nor the fact that he knew me by name. That would get me into more trouble than I was already. The last thing that I needed was for my father to believe that I hold an alliance with a demon or that Ιntentiolnally let him escape. 

''Hm, strange. Since the demon, as you say, was stronger than you why did he leave you there? Why didn't he take you with him for interrogation or at least kill you on the spot? It was a great opportunity since we made the mistake to send you there alone. Why didn't he?'' he questioned, eyes sparkling.

That was a very good question sad! I wish I could answer you but you know I was really busy fearing for my life! Stuck to the wall with a demon stronger than I have ever encountered, nearly shi myself from fear because you were stubborn enough to send your own daughter alone when you knew that she wasn't ready. No, you were right dad! I should have asked him..!

I wanted to say all those things. I wanted to scream and cry and yell at him. I wanted to burst out of that office right away. I wanted to tell him all the thoughts that tortured me since my mom died. I wanted to remind him that he was my father... That I wasn't just a warrior, I was a teenager and I wanted to live like one. I wanted my mommy back...

I didn't say anything. I just bowed my head one more time, a single tear trying to escape my eyes. He must have sensed that something was off so he didn't insist on the matter.

''You are dismissed Wilson...'' simply said and I burst out of his office. I ran into my room, locking the door behind me. Luckily I didn't have a roommate. As the leader's daughter, I had the privilege to have a room for myself. It was useful at times like this. I could not bear for anybody to see me cry. Not now, not ever will Amelia Wilson break down in front of a crowd.

Ι took off my clothes and throw them on the floor of my tiny bathroom. I opened the water in the bathtub and as I waited I took in my reflection on the big mirror. Saying that I was a mess would be an understatement. My long, brown hair fell on my solders messily and my big blue-green eyes were tired and full of dry tears. The two horizontal slits on my back were no longer so obvious. A sight that I had to open my wings for a long time. Of course, I wouldn't. Especially in front of my classmates. But at that moment, I wanted to see them. I started the proses slowly, careful not to feel any pain. The white feathers that I once worshiped were no longer the color that they were meant to be. Instead, they were grey and burned. They were something that another Angel, even a demon, would call ugly. That would be an understatement too. They weren't ugly, they were horrible.

Of course, they were different than the last time I show them. Most of the burns that I had suffered were now healed and they were no longer visible. That of course if you didn't count their unnatural color. Yeah, I could easily pass for a Dark one with those wings. The thought made me flinch, that result to me putting them back abruptly, causing a small cry to escape my lips. I wiped the tears that threatened to reappear and dipped into the bathtub.

The hot water calmed me instantly. I liked it so much that I stayed there for at least an hour. In the water, no unwanted though passing my mind. 

And then I show it. Big green eyes staring at me with mischief. I jumped out of the bathtub, covered myself in a towel and run back to my room. I put on my pajamas and I dipped into the covers of my bed. I took a bottle of sleeping pills that rested under my bed. I tried not to think it twice as I shoved a bunch into my mouth. That was it, all the thought just suddenly went I way. I pumped my head on the pillow and relaxed, blackness slowly taking over. And so I rested.