Queen of Nothing

Chapter 3

I straightened my black dress for the sixth time in front of the mirror. The black velvet dress was beautiful but the reason why I was wearing it was devastating. Vivi had barely spoken for three days now. After the home invasion Vivi got us a new apartment far from the old one. I had helped Vivi with the bodies and the cleaning. We had dumped the dead faeries in river since two of them had been seafolk. Orlagh or Nicasia had surely a hand in this. Heathers body me moved last. Vivi had cried the whole time as we worked. It broke something in me and I vowed that I would find the one who send the assassins and end him or her. We had moved Heathers body into the park under cover of a spell Vivi used so no one could tell. Vivi got a call later that night from Heathers mother. She had been crying as she told her about the police finding her daughter dead in the park. Vivi had cried again than and her question: "How could this happen?" Was something I had been asking myself way too many times now. Oak had stayed the first day home from school. He looked to be doing fine. However I caught him always scanning his surroundings. But he had been really good with his sword skills it made me a little proud. I stared at my reflection to see if my make up covered the lines beneath my eyes well enough. Satisfied it did, I pick up my cloak and enter the hallway of our new apartment. Oak is already waiting. He looks so much older in a black suit. He gives me a grime smile. "Vivi is still in her room." I look at Vivi's door at the other end of the hallway. "Give her a few more minutes." I tell Oak. This day was going to be hard on us all. I had asked Vivi if she wanted Taryn to come to the funeral as well. She had just told me she didn't want to bother her with this. I hate myself for feeling relieved that I won't have to face my treacherous sister any time soon. We have been waiting for fifteen minutes when Vivi finally steps out of her room. She is wearing a black dress with lace at the top and shoulders. She looks pal and her cat eyes are wary. "I hold out a hand to her. "Let's go." I say softly. She swallows but takes my hand as we leave the apartment.

It's easy to blend in at the funeral. A lot of Heathers friends and classmates have come to say goodbye. We sit just behind Heathers parents. The family gets the first row. Grandparents and cousins sit there wiping their eyes. I feel tears prick in my eyes when I see my sister staring longingly at the coffin. I wonder again if I could have saved Heather. If Oak would have been fine on his own. Or would it have been Oak in that coffin. Regret I find out is a worse feeling than being betrayed. To know you could have done something, but didn't. The priest tells us all what a terrible and cruel loss this is but that Heather is now in a better place with God. I scowl. Heaven seems like a place that can't be true. Faeries in mortal stories and movies are everything the real thing is not. Why would they know what happens after death if they don't even see danger where danger is. "Death is a constant companion of life. They go hand in hand as we sit here now, holding hands and praying for young Heather's soul." The priest goes on with his speech. My mind latches onto something. May your hands always be stained by blood. May death be your only companion. I take a shutting breath. Is this all my fault? I close my eyes and think back to all the lives that have been lost because of me. I am shocked to realise, that I killed quit a lot of people for my short human live. And only after I killed Valerian. My hands start to tremble so I sit on them. Not that anyone would notice right now. They are all sobbing and mourning the loss of Heather. And I might be the reason she died. But she came to the apartment for Vivi. I tell myself that. She didn't know I was even staying with Vivi. It was coincidence. Around me people start to rise and I quickly open my eyes to see a line forming for the coffin. People step forward and place flowers on the coffin murmuring their goodbyes. I follow Vivi into the line with Oak. When it is Vivi's turn she steps forward she takes a blue rose from her pocket. No doubt it is magical. And places it on the coffin. "I am sorry for not being a better girlfriend." She whispers. "I am sorry I let you down, I am sorry I brought this violence into your life." She let out a sob. "And I am sorry I wasn't there on time." Tears form again in her red rimmed eyes. "I love you." As she turned to me I couldn't make out her face, my own tears blurring the view. I picked up a flower and placed it on the coffin. "I'm sorry I failed you." I whisper, voice hoarse. I step back to Vivi's side taking her hand. She squeezes it tightly. Oak steps forward a circlet of branches artfully woven like a crown in his hands. I blink. He hadn't had this a moment ago. Oak steps up to the coffin placing the crown of branches on it's head. "Long live the queen of my sisters heart. May she live on forever in our hearts." I have no words. No one in the room does. Vivi kneels down and hugs Oak to her chest, her tears never stopping. For a moment I just stare tears sliding down my face. Feeling hollow. Long live the queen. I glance at my ring. The ruby shimmers in the dim light. I had put it on today. I don't quit know why. But it felt like some sort of support. And I needed every bit of support I could get right now. After a moment I step forward and join the hug of tears and hurt.

We come home late in the evening. All looking like the living dead. Vivi went for her room right away. So I took care of Oak. "Shall we make pancakes?" I ask him. He nods. "Help me with them?" "Sure." We make pancakes together. When Vivi walks in a while later she laughs. I look at her with a questioning gaze and she just says. "You both look like pancakes." And true enough, we're both covered with flour. The dress and the suit are ruined. But Vivi laughed. Even if it was just a short moment of joy. It was something. I smile. "Sorry, I spilled some flour." She just shakes her head as she takes a seat at the dinner table. "Vivi I made this!" Oak is fast to serve Vivi has own made pancake. Vivi forces a smile. "Did you now? That's impressive." We eat pancakes together as Oak tries to cheer up the mood by talking about school. It is mostly him and me talking though. Vivi stays quit. After the meal I take Oak to bed. When I get back into the living room I find Vivi looking through a photobook. She must have made one with Heather. I decide to give her some space and retreat into my own room. Before we got rid of the bodies we had searched them for anything that could give us any lead on our enemy. They had hardly anything on them. Just one had a small bag on him. Inside were some gold coins and a pen. I sit my desk and turn one of the gold coins over in my hand. It's not stamped with any seal, any alliance. All we had to go on was that two of them were of the seafolk. It makes sense for them to want to get rid of Oak. If Nicasia thinks she can marry Cardan she can be queen. And it would be best if there was no one else who could take the throne from her and her beloved. I look at the ring and sigh. Cardan could have done it too. But he was no murderer. Or so he kept saying. He also say he wanted me to trust him. To show me I didn't have to order him to do something, when he let Taryn free Madoc from his vows to the crown. I again wonder how long my sister had played me the fool. First with Locke, then her attempts to make up with me. All so she could play me again. Was Locke in on this game as well I wonder. He could be. He likes stories way to much. With that in mind I look at the pen on my desk. A dancing faun is engraved on it. And something clicks in my mind. I once saw a dress like this. I had worn a dress with dancing fauns on it. It was Locke's mothers. My stomach lurks. I feel sick and angry all at once. With trembling hands I reach for it. I turn it around in my hands. It looks like a turning mechanism. So I turn the pen. Instead of its point coming out a small piece of paper does roll of the pen. I take it and unfold it. In small letters is written:

"Kill the child and all he's with."

Suddenly I want to burn this letter. Tear it into pieces and the writer of it too. I know the handwriting. And I know I shouldn't be surprised but I feel the blow anyway. Locke had tried to kill me before. Writing it on a piece of paper and sending assassins wasn't anything new. But Oak. He wanted Oak dead and he had send assassins to kill him. To kill me and even Vivi because she was who he was with. He wanted us all dead. Madoc wouldn't agree with this. Vivienne was his heir. Locke had others plans for sure. I wonder what he planned to tell Taryn if the assassins had succeeded. My mind whirls. And then a plan starts to form in my mind. And it's a good plan. I wouldn't even need Madoc to get me back into Faerie. All I need is: my sisters.