Ever After

Twin Size Mattress

TRIGGER WARNING: this chapter contains abusive language and themes of bullying towards LGBT+

Grayson didn't get much sleep. He kept waking up, tossing and turning, almost waking James a handful of times.

It was somewhere around six am, the sun was rising and starting to peak through James' curtains.

Grayson rubbed his eyes, sighing out. He probably wasn't going to be able to sleep anymore than he already had.

He wished it were easier. He wished it wasn't seen as abnormal to most people. He was already dreading the hate comments he would get. The stares and the whispers.

The younger really wasn't looking forward to coming out.

Coming out. Grayson hated those words. Why did it have to be such a big thing? Why couldn't he just like who he liked?

Next to him, James shifted, turning over to curl into Grayson's side. The younger froze. Was this okay? Should he wake him?

"Have you been up all night?" Came James' voice, eyes still closed, making the other jump a little.

Grayson sighed, forcing himself to untense. No doubt it was his rigidness that woke James. "I think I got thirty minutes, maybe an hour."

Despite not being able to sleep, his voice was still weak. James could tell he was still scared. He'd probably been imagining the worst case scenario.

James lifted his head a little, resting it on Grayson's chest. He could feel the younger's heart speed up and as much as it made him want to smile, he knew now wasn't the time.

"You should stop thinking. You're going to worry yourself sick." James mumbled, watching as Grayson bit the inside of his cheek.

Grayson's eyes flicked to meet James'. "What do I tell, E?" He repeated his question from last night.

James hummed. "The truth?" The oldest knew Grayson was scared, but nothing good came from hiding who you were. James had been through that already. It also wasn't very healthy.

"What if he hates me?" Grayson asked. He'd been thinking about it. Sure, Ethan had never made a big deal about James, but he was still a little thrown off when James leaned on him or hugged him or said something overly gay.

It wasn't a big deal, but Grayson could tell it put Ethan on a slight edge. But maybe every straight guy was like that.

James thought Grayson was being kind of ridiculous. Hate him? There wasn't anything that could separate those two.

The oldest smiled a little. "He's not going to hate you, Grayson. I doubt he's even going to give it a second thought."

"And if he does?" Grayson frowned. He knew James was trying to help, but right now the only thing he could think about was his brother turning on him. Or his family back in Jersey. His friends.

James brought a hand up, carding his fingers through the younger's curls to try and calm him. "Then we deal with that when it comes, but don't worry about something that hasn't even happened yet. Especially when there's only a slight chance of it."

Grayson let his eyes slip closed again, leaning into the older's touch. James was making a lot of sense, but he couldn't stop his worrying. It was going to eat him alive.

The younger sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning. Why was this so exasperating? "Okay." He mumbled.

Neither said a word for what felt like forever. James didn't want to force Grayson to talk if he wasn't ready. It seemed he was just collecting his thoughts though.