Life on a demand

#4

I cried to God about it because I couldn't explain it to anyone else ...

Its not easy to talk about mental heath, because sometimes it hurts that no person can understand what you go through.

How can you open up?!
With the risk of someone thinking you've lost your mind, and when you do open up, there nothing to find, its just crazy

How to express emotions that no one else feels?!

You begin to question if your life is even real??

Especially when it comes the same scenarios again.
Replaying on my brain, until you cant understand, until it pushes you onto insanity...

And it feels like no one will believe you.

Then you show up with smile like "everything is fine" but when you're forced to release the pain. You don't know if you should show your stains, and speak up then your brain starts asking you
"Where could you possibly start so that everything makes sense?"

So I don't blame you when you avoid the talking, its difficult to speak.
I understand ...
Especially if it makes you feel weak.

Its hard to be this sensitive and yet strong , to be bothered by everything yet pretend like nothing hurts you at all
Its so hard to focus when your brain has so many things agains the society.

Deed down ... I am tired of trying to fit in with people, to adapt to their taste, to do what they want me to do.

It kinda suck to say that I am the one who makes myself feel bad, I am the one who hurts myself to the point where i hate everything...
I am the person who can allow myself to feel this way.
No matter what people do or what happens in my life, the gate to letting the negativity influence me have to end, its all lies on my hands.

Warren Buffett once said "You will continue to suffer if you have emotional reaction to everything said to you.
True power is sitting back and observe things with logic.
True power is restraint.
If words control you that mean everyone else can control you.
Breath and allow everything to pass"

I felt that honestly ...