Loving Ms. Mills

Really Swan

Emmas p.o.v*
An hour went by and it only felt like 5 minutes. I jump out of bed. Not ready for what the school day brings to me. Sometimes I just feel like ending it all because this shit can become so damn hard at times.
Henry is still sleeping so I just get ready and leave. Mary agreed to make him breakfast and wait till Ruby got there before leaving. Since I technically fired belle I have to Hire Ruby for a moment. I leave and I'm really late for 1st period but I at least I don't have to worry about being late to 2nd today. I make it to first and I'm practically sleep waking up as soon as the bell rings.

As I'm walking to 2nd my attention refocused on my locker that everyone seemed to be surrounding. I walk over to it and open it and a whole bunch of papers came flying out and scatter across the hallway floor. Everyone just laughed. I picked one up and opened it. It was a picture of me the one time I decided to do a one-night stand at a house party under the photo it had in big print "SLUTY SWAN." I dropped it and ran into the girl's restroom closing the door behind me. I wondered how they all got that picture I thought it was a picture of the past but you know shit comes back to haunt you in your most vulnerable moments sometimes. 

As I'm in the stall crying I hear the sound of stilettos clicking against the floor. "Swan... Open up."
I hear in a demanding voice. look through the crack to see Miss. Mills leaning against the door. I open it and she yells at me to get to class. I just start crying. "Oh stop that swan. It's okay people ditch all the time but you will not be ditching my class."
I wipe my tears and she looks at me firmly. "wow, you're so self-centered you clearly can't see the situation happening at hand. I mean it's all over the floor you had to have seen it." She looked me up and down and then turned around.
"Class now"

As soon as we walked out she got the janitor to clear out my locker and all the papers off the floor and we both made our way into the classroom. Then it hits me. Holy fucking shit it's Friday... I forgot my lines!
"I'm fired," I said to myself. I frantically take out the papers I did have finished a scurried to write a few more. After a few minutes I heard the clicking of heels approach me and skip me. I sigh in relief and lean back into my chair when I hear them stop. I look back and she turns towards me and raises a brow. "Wait swan. You owe me lines!" 

"Yes. I'm sorry miss mills I forgot. I have some of the ones I did though."
"Give them to me Monday but you're not getting off so easily next time."
"Today's assignment we're going to be writing a poem about something that hurt you mentally or physically but do not state what that it is."
I think to myself. Interesting so I pick up my pencil and start writing. 

" 11 years old. I was Eleven years old when he planted a seed inside me so far up that it was impossible to get out. I was holding a seed as a child and I had no idea how to grow it. A seed so heavy I wasn't sure id make, A seed so warm it almost popped. I held the seed in the palms of my hands until the branches pierced through my fingertips leaving me with nothing but empty holes and sleepless nights. I was 11 years old and had no idea how to plant a seed but yet I held my hand closed so tight that the seed thrived. It blossomed and bloomed higher than a kite. I was eleven years old holding a life but wanting to end mine."

The more I thought about it the more I wondered if this was appropriate to turn in. I mean Ms. Mills was so caught up in her own little fantasy land that I doubt that she would even give this poem any thought to it at all other than it being about me learning to garden at a very young age. 

Soon the bell rang and I continued the rest of the day in peace and unbothered for once. I almost took everything in me not to just go home but the fact that the rest of the day was very peaceful for me motivated me to stay at school and push. I like to tell myself i'm doing this for Henry but really I think I need this the most. I refuse to become a statistic you know.

When I got home I saw that henry was asleep and mom. Ruby had both left already. So I put my bag down and head to the bedroom. I open up my laptop and go on Facebook to see 400 people commenting on my status about French fries. "Your such a slut."
"Your mom should be ashamed."
"Family disgrace." I close my laptop and start crying hella hard. what did I even do to deserve this much hate from my peers? It's not like I fucked someone's boyfriend, I'm not a home wrecker either so I don't understand why they all hate me. 
"Momma... Why are you crying."
Henry has this thing where he knows when I'm crying and he tries to make everything better.
"Yeah, baby I'm all good. why are you awake? You should be sleeping love bug."
"Want me to lay with you."
"Yes please."
He puts his head on my chest and we fall sound asleep holding each other tightly.