Screams. (sequel to Silence.

chapter thirteen

-not edited I apologize-

-M-

"LUKE HURRY UP!" I heard Ashton whining , pounding on the door until Luke finally emerged from the bathroom.

"Calm your shit Irwin, jesus. " Luke sputtered quietly as Ash pushed passed him. 

"What's his problem? " Luke asked Cal, pointing toward the bathroom where Ash was.

"I don't know really, he's been getting jealous of fans. I find it really stupid." Calum sighed, his eyes flickering between Luke and I .

"So is Jacey coming to the show tonight?" Calum asked to me and I just nodded slightly.

To be honest I'm nervous. Really nervous. Chances are nothing will happen, to her at least. But there's really nothing to do if she does feel something. I can't just drop out of the band,  and she refuses to quit school.

"Hey there's, clifford!" I heard the strong Manchester accent and of course turned to see the small fringed boy named Louis.

Harry was close at his heels, Liam and Niall chattering behind them with Zayn seeming distant.

"Hey Zayn, " I greeted him, patting him and giving a reassuring smile.

He smiled slightly but still seemed upset.

"is something wrong?"

"Sorry.. just miss Perrie a lot already. Just don't feel as... alive without her." He said quietly, fiddling with his hands as we made our way to the couch.

Once ash came out of the bathroom from pouting him and cal had their little talks they have about jealous and soon left the couch for a "quickie".

"i know what you mean... it's always been like that with J. " I replied as we sat down.

"She's coming to the show right? "

I nodded slightly and a small smile formed on his lips.

"Perrie is already sensing that Jacey still likes you know. Her senses are never wrong, I'm telling ya. "

"I don't know," I shrugged, "even if she did we'd have no time for each other. "

Their was a small silence. I listened to Ashton and Harry conversation about various things, Calum sulking by Luke. 

"JACEY!!" Ashton squealed and I turned my head from Cal to see her. Iz was beside her, making her way to Luke obviously. Apparently they're getting serious again.

J smiled beamingly as she made her way to Ash, enveloping him in a hug and giving Harry a small hug as well.

She made her rounds of the 7 boys until she finally made her way toward the couch.

She shook Zayns' hand,  greeting him quietly.

"Hi mike," She said quietly, almost a whisper.

"Hey J,"

"How are you? "

"I'm okay,  " I half way lied. "And you?"

Don't get me wrong,  performing and the fam make me happy but it's when I'm laying in bed at night that it actually gets to me.

"I've been good.. busy, but good. " she replied softly.

I felt Zayn tap at my shoulder beside me. "We have to go on stage in three minutes," he whispered and I nodded slightly.

" i uh, have to get ready to go on stage.. you should probably go find your seat. " I said to J as I stood up.

I couldn't help but smile at how short she was compared to me. I've grown a few inches since we dated, so now I'm basically exactly a foot taller than her.

"Okay, see you after the show?" She bit at her lip, hesitating before getting on her tippy toes wrapping her arms around my neck. She let go after a couple seconds, leaving me alone.

-

After the show we made our way back stage, everyone exhausted except Niall and Ash. I swear those boys never run out of energy.

"Heyyy mikeyy, " I turned to see a slurring and giggling J.

"How much did you drink? "

She shrugged her shoulders at me and giggling again.  I shook my head and let out an exasperated sigh.

"Where's iz?" I questioned.

"She went somewhere with Lukey," She giggled again and stepped closer to me, grabbing at the ends of my shirt.

"When are you gonna dye your hair again?" She said after a few seconds as she reached up and took my bleached hair into her fingers.

"Maybe next week?  Not sure. " I looked down at her, barely recognizing the giggling mess looking up at me.

I felt her hands go from my hair to the back of my neck, pulling my mouth to hers. Her lips and breath reeked of alcohol but I didn't pull away.

She giggled and hid into my chest as she pulled away.

"J?"

"Yes mikey? "

"Are we gonna try to make this work or not?  I - I just can't deal not knowing... do you still feel anything? "

She shrugged lightly, looking down at the ground.

"i shouldn't be asking you this when you're drunk. You aren't going to be honest. I'm pretty sure you don't like me anyways. This is a complete waste. My life has been a complete waste- " my rant was cut off by her lips on mine once again.

"Don't talk like that, " She pouted as she pulled away, "you're not a waste... everyone loves you.."

"Does everyone include you?" I asked and she stayed quiet a few seconds, seeming to sober up a bit.

"I... I just dont know how this could work.. With school and all." She said quietly.

"You can go back to school anytime J, I can't just up and leave the band can I?" I asked softly.

She shook her head. "You don't understand. "

I furrowed my eyebrows.  "Don't understand what? "

"Your dream was always to be in a band, correct? Remember you told me that at the facility .." i winced lightly at the mention of the facility. 

To be honest I forget about it unless it's mentioned.  I don't like to think about it, because then I start to miss it.

"mhmm." I replied and she continued. 

"Well being a physiologist is my dream... ever since I was a little girl I loved helping people and hearing their problems... I don't want to hold back my dream because of whatever this is," She guestered from me to her.

I opened my mouth to say something but she interjected.  "You damn sure didn't hold back your dream for me so why should I?"

I just nodded lightly, focusing on not letting my eyes water.

I honestly don't know why I'm getting so upset, everything she's saying is completely true. I guess it's just hearing her say it makes it sound worse.

"I understand.." i said quietly, looking down to avoid her gaze.

"Michael, look at me,"

I looked up to meet her eyes that were also watering. "This is really hard for me too.. but when the time is right we can try, right? "

She sniffled lightly, "The only thing that scares me is what if you find another girl better than me? What if you can't wait any longer & move on...

I nodded again and wiped the tear that slowly started running down her cheek.

"I'll wait for you forever if I have to, Jacey Grace.

AN - WOW FINALLY AN UPDATE I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY LMAO I'VE BEEN SUPER BUSY WITH SCHOOL AND STUFF BUT HOPEFULLY YOU LIKE THE CHAPTER EVEN THOUGH IT'S SAD ILY GUYS

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