Is It?

Chapter 2

You looked around the room. You'd spent three years claiming this space as your own, laying your head next to his on these pillows, whispered I love yous in the dark before falling asleep, physical affirmations of love between damp sheets and gasped breaths. Now it felt cold and empty. These were going to be your last moments here. Would he care? Would he be relieved?

You sighed deeply and set about the task of removing yourself from Ji-hoon's life. You moved slowly around the room your mind cataloged the items to leave behind. You'd made the decision to leave behind anything he bought you. No clothes, bags, shoes or jewelry, pictures or anything else that could remind you of him would be making the move with you. You didn't want any to leave him with any excuse to see you. Come to think of it you better leave your half of the utilities behind too.

You stood at the door with everything you were taking packed and resting in bags at your feet. The items you'd be leaving behind were put into garbage bags for him to donate, throw away or give to her. He could do whatever his little heart desired with them. A check and your key were waiting for him on the dining room table. There was no note to leave. He didn't need an explanation of why you'd left.

It was funny. You'd always thought you'd rant and rave, fuck the place up, bleach his clothes, shred the couch or something to really leave your mark if it ever came to this. Rage, you thought would be your go to emotion if you found out he'd been unfaithful. In the end, you just didn't have the energy for it. Overwhelming sadness was what you felt. Four and half years with him and three of them spent in this house making it a home for the two of you.

Your gaze turned watery and a moment later a tear slid down your cheek. You quickly and harshly wiped it away. "Nope, don't do it." You muttered to yourself. You'd never cried over a man and you damn sure weren't going to start now. You straighten your spine and slammed the door behind you. You took a deep breath trying to get control of your emotions but it turned into a sob. Your hand flew to your mouth to try and stifle the sound. You dropped down to your butt amongst your bags. Betrayal, you were finding was painful. Gut wrenching, can't catch your breath, burning sensation in your chest painful.

You drew what strength you had together and resolutely wiped your eyes. You would allow yourself the tears shed here and no more. You squared your shoulders and left. One call to your old roommate and best friend and you had somewhere to go. It was over.

She opened the door and her arms quick drawing you in. "Girl, let me know when you done cryin. I want to be messy." She said in a serious tone but you could never take her seriously.

You answered with a laugh. "Count on you to want to make a mess."

She smirked "Still have San's number?"

You rolled your eyes but were still smiling "Girl, stop. That man was not and is not interested in me."

"Mm-hmm, that's what you say but I saw how he used to look at you."

You laughed "You just never liked Ji-hoon."

She scoffed "And for good reason. I thought my car keyin days were over." She sighed "But it looks Ji-hoon's will be my last."

You couldn't do anything but shake your head. She'd do it. Hell, she'd film it and send it to him.

She took a moment to look you over. It was clear you'd been crying. "Girl, come on. Let me get you in your old room." She put her arm around your shoulder. "I hope somebody beats his ass." She grumbled while leading you down the hall.

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Ji-hoon arrived at the studio not long after leaving your house. He stood in front of the door. He knew she'd be on the other side. Waiting for him. This was wrong on so many levels. He'd been somewhat honest when he said he hadn't touched her. If he was honest he would've said he barely touched her. Kissing, hand holding, cuddling on the couch in this very studio, he'd done all of that and more. The only thing he hadn't done was have sex with her. He paused at that thought. His mind going back to a night he was supposed to just take her home from the club. That car ride resulted in oral. They'd come dangerously close to having sex that night and several other times. He couldn't bring himself to cross that boundary. Foolishly, he thought if he didn't do that. He could redeem himself if you ever found out.

You were right to be suspicious. He knew that. He knew he should cut it off with her or end it with you. Unable to do either. Ji-hoon continued to play the dangerous game. He squared his shoulders and cut off all thoughts of you as he opened the door. She was there in the chair, all plush body and seductive smile. She bit her bottom lip and let her eyes roam over him and that feeling stirred in his gut. One more night and he'd stop. One more night and he'd make it right. He thought and closed the door behind him.

Hours later Ji-hoon came home. The house was completely dark and quiet. He expected it to be thinking that you must have calmed down and gone to sleep. He crept to the bedroom trying not to wake you up. His eyes had adjusted to the darkness and he stood in the doorway staring at the bed in confusion. Your outline was missing. He quickly flipped on the light and noticed several things. The bed was made, the clock was missing from the nightstand, your robe wasn't hanging on the door to the bathroom. He quickly went to the closet wrenching the door open. Your clothes were gone. He checked the bathroom next, toothbrush, hair products, loofa, body wash, all missing. He ripped through the house all of it gone. Everything was gone. He stood in front of the garbage bags you'd left now emptied. The things he'd bought.

"FUCK!" He yelled. His hands were on his head and he dropped into the opposite couch. You'd left him. You'd really left him. He felt a flash of anger. His phone was in his hand and he was quickly calling you.

Four rings later and you answered sounding just as awake as he was. "Where are you?" His voice was gruff. "Where the hell did you go?" He was breath was picking up.

You sighed into the phone. "I left, Ji-hoon." You rolled over onto your back. You'd been staring out the window of your old room. Your best friend hadn't said much after getting you to the room. She knew you'd talk when you felt up to it.

"I can see that. Where did you go? I'm coming to get you." He said standing from the couch.

"No, you're not. It's over Ji-hoon. You made your choice." You flung an arm over your eyes.

"Made my choice? That's how you feel? You're just going to throw away four years. Just like that?" He hissed into the phone.

You pulled it away from your face and closed your eyes. The anger you expected to feel earlier was finally making an appearance. "I know good and damn well you are not trying to put this on me." You sat up completely.

"I'm not the one parading around with some bitch. I'm not the one not the one out all damn night. I'm not the one hiding my phone. I'm not the one..." You trailed off.

"Ji-hoon I don't know who the fuck you thought you were dealing with but I ain't the one. Now, I suggest you check yo tone and try again." One arm held the phone to your ear and the other rested against your leg.

"You threw away four years the moment you said yes to her instead of no. You threw away four years when you walked out that door tonight. I'M DONE." You hung the phone up not giving him a moment to respond. You quickly turned your phone off.

You threw the covers back and stomped out the room. A moment later you were standing in your best friend's doorway. "GIRL!" You shouted. She looked up and took in your furious expression.

"Oooo, bitch what'd he do?" She sat up ready to receive the tea you were inevitably about to spill.