I've Seen The Other Side (TomTord)

Chapter 16- Apartment

Tord's POV:

     Pain.

     It's everything  I felt in what feels like forever, physical and mental. It dwells in my mind, rakes through every inch of my thin body, sinks in my cold, grief-struck heart, and cuts me deeper than any knife. 

     But nothing is deeper than the hundreds of cuts that are carved into my wrists and arms. 

     As I continued to allow the toxic thoughts poison my blurry mind, I hadn't come to realize or even heard that Edd was calling out my name from the driver's seat in the front of the car, attempting to catch my attention. 

     I force myself to step out of the cold and dark world my mind was dwelling in, and pay attention to what he was trying to do. "W-What Edd? I'm... sorry... I-I didn't... h-hear you." I say, extremely flustered. 

     "It's alright Tord, no need to apologize. I was only letting you know that we'll be home in about fifteen minutes or so." Edd exclaimed, looking at me through the driver's mirror, I only nod weaker than ever, and allow my limp, worthless body slump down farther into my seat. 

     As the minutes passed by like shadows in a night sky, silence had taken a good hold of the four of us, which allow a sense of tension gradually build up with every passing second. Even if none of us spoke aloud, I could easily feel the deep hatred radiating off from Tom, who sat next right next to me. 

     The scent of strong alcohol stained the front of his blue hoodie, and clung to his body, making it hard to breathe without choking on the fumes. He drunkenly presence was quite uncomfortable as it was, which only caused a sick feeling to form in the empty pit of my stomach.

     "How the fuck are you still alive?" A familiar whispering voice flooded the back of my mind with any warning, grabbing me by slight surprise. "I thought I told you to go kill yourself..." Scolded the voice, it's violent tone stabbing me like needles of shame. I only heave a deep sigh, making my chest wheezing in the process. 

     "I-I'm... s-sorry..." I whisper ever so quietly, trying to hide my answer from the other. I really didn't need Edd or Matt to worry about me, and I definitely did not need Tom thinking I've gone and lost my mind.

      "Sorry doesn't cut it, and you know that. So when we get home, I'll make sure you never disobey me again..." 

     The powerful and threatening tone in its voice always made me feel so, so small and even weaker. I couldn't even stand up against myself. I silently pleaded for the next few minutes for the voice to please leave me alone and not to hurt me, but I got no answer, which only meant I had no chance in changing its mind.

     Looking up from my view of the outside world through the window, I see Edd looking at me through the mirror once again. "Hey... Are you okay Tord?" Questioned Edd, Tom looked in my direction, giving me a nasty, hate-filled look. 

     Without paying much attention to Tom, I look back at Edd through the mirror and force a fake smile. Satisfied with my response, Edd looks away and continues to drive down the car filled road. 

     Every ticking second became slower and slower until it seemed to defy the laws of time, and each breath I took became stiller and stiller until it was as dead as time itself. Hours seemed to pass by until we began driving in a very familiar area of the downtown part of the city.

     Then my remaining eye met with a certain spot I wished never to see nor remember of ever again. Even amongst the cars that occasionally drive over the road, I could still perfectly see the faint, but deeply colored blood stain that had soaked into the road all those days ago.