I'm Okay. Sort Of.

Before England

This is the new version guys! Tell me if it's better!

God Bless

-LeeSosa

            A strand of my dark brown hair swayed in the breeze, tickling my nose as I typed away on my computer, writing a new song in my purple laptop that had been given to me as a present from my father. Bruce Greene is a well-known, respected business man that had a serious face and an understanding heart. He was busy signing a deal with some men in Japan today leaving me without my favorite person. I was finished typing the last chorus and started turning off my computer when the screen saver started and a small, toothy grin took over my screen and mind.

Suddenly I wasn't in my blue-gray room and I was in a dark memory that always came to mind. It's as if I could feel the rain that attacked my face, like sharp needles striking to my core. I turned; I could see my small frame, like a dream.

"Where are you going Nate? We can't leave!" I screamed over the storm that roared in anger over us. There I was, my ten year old self, reliving the worst day of my life.

Levi Dawson, the boy of my toothy grins and the most perfect eyes I would ever come to see in my lifetime. My ten year old self shivered; wet inside her rain boots, the ones that mom had customized to have light sabers on.

Levi's frown is what I remember, the last thing I saw from my best friend, before he ran off to his house and left me in a puddle, confused and hurt. I was 10, an age that one wouldn't consider to know these things, but I knew he was my best friend.

"Was" being the focus of that statement.

Best friends don't leave each other.

The sound of a car entering the driveway brought me back to current time, my screen had finally turned off and I sat there in the dark, alone. Too distraught to move, it's been a while since the last time I thought of that day.

I pushed back the strands of my hair, again. My fingers getting tangled in the ends, my scalp almost welcoming the pain. I stood up carefully; my toe wouldn't last another stubbing this week.

Walking out of the blue cave I called sanctuary, I headed to the kitchen where I knew my mom was preparing dinner after just having gotten home. I passed the hall successfully avoiding the pictures that were pinned proudly on the wall. Seeing a glimpse of her smile almost made me stop in my tracks, but I had to keep moving. I was almost to the kitchen anyway.

My mother stood there by the stove, the sunset's rays streaming through the blinds, like intricate fingers, clasping her light blonde hair almost making her glow. My mother had the looks of an angel and the personality of a CEO. Cold and distant, the way a woman would be when they have a troubled life.

She doesn't know the truth, which might be why she turned to the frozen self she is. Her daughter turned into a weeping mess at only ten years of age and has been that way for almost ten years. Her glow was fading and it was something I couldn't stop, even if I wanted to, and believe me I wanted to, so, so badly. Her only happiness was when my dad was at home, because then I was with him and not her, yeah I know it's wasn't really why you thought, but I will always feel like a burden to her, as long as her smile escapes every time I walk into the room, I know that that's what I am to her.

I walked slowly, making sure to drag my feet and feel the cool floor rubbing on my fluffy blue, striped socks. My legs getting goose bumps from the blasting AC, my polka dotted shorts falling loosely on my thighs. The large shirt was my dad's, because I missed him and had to hug something that smelled like his cologne. I passed the marble counter top to sit on the wooden table that stood at the center.