Just Different

Chapter 38

Brad slouched miserably in his desk, a firm frown on his face. His eyes were on the back of Rob's head. He imagined lasers burning a hole through the boy's head. Before, it was a blessing to have the desk behind Rob's. Now, he wanted to be anywhere else in the world.

Rob felt the imaginary lasers and fought the urge to turn around. He continued writing his notes, scribbling furiously to distract the glares and stares he felt piercing through him. It wasn't just Brad's eyes on him, but the whole class room's eyes were too. He hated how fast everyone found out things. The gossip in this school is out of control. It had been several days since everything happened, but that's all it took.

All he could hear among the whispers was "Brad...Chester....Rob.....gay...."

He felt ashamed now more than ever. He wished the ground would open up and swallow him up so he could disappear forever and not deal with the hurt and shame that was being cast down on him. Rob wondered how Brad felt...

Angry, no doubt. But Rob wondered if his former friend felt any remorse or understanding for him. Rob was only trying to find the best way to get Brad... He is a dude. It's not like it was going to be a piece of cake anyways. Chester was only trying to help Rob as well.

Rob shifted in his seat. Eyeballs snapped on and off him.

Chester did spread rumors. Nobody would like rumors spread about them. But then again, how else was Chester going to make Elisa go away for sure? Rob head was hurting now and he was blaming Brad's imaginary eye lasers.

He was so tempted to look at the desk behind him. He was scared to sit up and put his pencil down. He thought maybe he would feel Brad's angry breath down his neck. And Rob wasn't sure he wanted the other boy's breathing in his ear... at least not in this context.

It was ages until the bell would ring and both boys sat in their desks uncomfortably. They were both suffering silently from being in such close proximity on such bad terms. Rob wanted to turn around and cry and beg for Brad's forgiveness. Brad wanted to scream and throw his fists at Rob until he lost all his energy.

Half the class jumped from the sound of the door opening. Chester walked in, late as usual. The odd thing was moments after Chester walked in so did Mike. Rob's head turned slightly to glance at Mike's chair. He could've sworn Mike entired the class earlier. Apparently not though, as Mike was now filling his chair.

"Shinoda, last warning. Bennington, you know the deal."

"The chalkboard will be squeaky clean," Chester's voice rang behind Rob, his signature smirk audible in his voice.

With Chester in the room, Rob felt a little more at ease. He still felt physically tense, though. He finally sat up, feeling his muscles cry in relief, and out his pencil down. Rob didn't feel Brad breathing down his neck and his anxiety lessened.

***

Brad was too angry to notice when Mike began to slow his walking. He slowed down enough that moments later Brad was a good six feet away from Mike, turning into the classroom.

Making sure none of his friends were around to see him, Mike began to walk back down the hallway. The stream of students thinned and eventually the halls emptied and the bell rang. Mike exited the school and went towards the tennis courts.

Chester was walking towards the building, but he was taking his time getting there. He didn't care much about anatomy class anyways. Chester stared at phineas as he walked. When he looked up, Mike Shinoda was walking towards him.

"Shit." Chester pocketed his phone and slowed down to a stop. "May I help you?"

"Just came to talk Bennington."

"About what," Chester sighed, his hand settling on his hip.

"How's Rob holding up?"

"He's... holding. He's still real hurt about everything."

Mike nodded. It was silent.

"I've noticed Rob's eyes are red in the mornings."

Chester scoffed. "You're not gonna give me the talk are you? He's a big boy Mikey, he can make those decisions on his own."

Mike frowned, offended. "Okay, okay. I was just wondering, alright?" He looked down at his feet. He wasn't really there about Rob. He was actually there to find out what Chester wanted. Sam said he wanted to talk about Mike. He was terrified it was going to be about that night. Mike was hoping it was anything else other than than night, as he was trying to hard to repress his feelings for the other boy.

"Look, I'm actually here to talk to you. You wanted to talk to me a couple weeks but I never found you. And with all this stuff going on, I haven't caught a chance to be alone with you.

Chester blinked. He stood there for a moment, dumbfounded. Alone with you.

He shook his head. "Oh, yeah..."

He had forgotten too. The whole event with Dave ruined Chester's train of thought that day, he totally forgot he wanted to talk to Mike about that night... But Chester didn't want to think about it or talk about it.

"Well I actually can't remember."

Mike's heart skipped a beat before it started slowing down once it realized Chester didn't mention their fling.

The two boys stood on the sidewalk facing each other awkwardly. Like Brad and Rob, being in such close proximity was giving them uneasy, yet their circumstances were different. Chester wanted to grab Mike and hold him, maybe never let go. Mike wanted to grab Chester and hold him, maybe never let go.

But now wasn't the time.

"Let's walk to class?" Chester broke the tension. Mike nodded humbly and turned back towards the building, Chester beside him. They began to walk in silence. Chester couldn't stand the memories of that night gnawing at him.

"I do need to talk to you about something."

Mike's heart raced once again. "Um, what's up?"

"Mike, about that night- we can't keep doing this."

"What?"

"This back and forth. This hiding." Chester paused because he was starting to choke up. And it wasn't his usual fake crying, the words he was coming up with in his head brought a lump to his throat. "If everyone else can't accept that Rob made a move on Brad, then us, together-" Chester's hand motioned between he and Mike, "No one's ever going to be okay with that."

"What about you and Phi?"

"That's not intimate. That's not..." He was about to say love. That would be implying he loved Mike, and even Chester wasn't sure if he was ready or not to admit it. "It wasn't real. He used me, I used him."

Mike nodded again.

"And people knew. To them, we're just a bunch of kinky fucks."

"They wouldn't take us seriously," Mike said quietly.

"Exactly," Chester whispered.

The walked into the building.

Mike didn't know that Chester was secretly indulging in small intimacies with Rob, and Chester wanted it to stay that way. Mike looked heartbroken, he was good at hiding it though. But now, alone with Chester, he didn't seem like he wanted to hide it. It was easier to be someone's free and wild, experienced first lover than be vulnerable and timid with his own first lover.

"So then, we go our separate ways," Mike said.

"It's probably for the best."

Chester's heart ached, and it made his hand inch towards Mike's. They weren't looking at each other, but Mike's hand instinctively did the same. Their fingers brushed and it was like something clicked and urged them to hold hands.

They were nearing their class. Once they reached the door, Chester's hand slowly pulled away. Mike's lingered for a few seconds, not wanting to let go. Chester's right hand opened the door and he stepped inside. Mike stood by the door, hidden by the lockers. He took a deep breath then stepped inside.