Fearless~Hardzello

sixteen

joe's pov

a few months pass and rami visits every few weeks bringing ben and i newspapers, informing us of the current state of the world. our impact seems to last quite a while. i'm not sure how the people will react once ben and i are released from this hellhole. we promised to fight together. i sit with ben at the cafeteria, fighting my sick urges down like the potatoes that are given to us daily. ben's fingers grip my knee in a tight hold. i know he means well, his touch reminds me he's going through it too. i drop my fork and it makes a quiet clang on the floor. people turn and look at it but then go back to their business. i start gagging quietly and run to the trashcan. ben knows to stay away from me when i get like this i gag but nothing comes out. i start to cry, dry heaving is so uncomfortable and i just feel like this is all my fault. if i could just go back and never fall in love with ben, everything would have been okay. right? ben stands in front of me as i curl my knees up to my chest and breathe heavily.
"joe, i'm so sorry" ben says softly.
"i-it's okay. i just feel as if i could have prevented this" i say. ben shakes his head.
"we both know this was our fate. we just have to stay strong. stay fearless" ben says. i close my eyes and nod. ben pulls me to him, the sickness coming back but i hug back through the discomfort.
"ben.. thank you" i say. he laughs softly.
"of course" he replies. he lets go of me and we go back to our eating, this time ben sits a little bit away from me to make it easier for me to finish eating. i hate how this is what will become of us. the days and nights go by eternally slow until finally the day of our release comes. i wake up giddy to get back out to the world. this must be how prisoners feel on their release day. i eat my breakfast quickly and happily, i'm so excited to spend every day with ben again. a nurse hands me my washed clothes that i came with on my first day. i put on the now clean newsboy outfit and walk with her to the main entrance. i breathe in deeply. this is it. my torture is finally over. we wait for a few minutes for ben to show up and he comes down, a huge smile plastered on his face. i'm sure we share the same smile. ben contains himself. i know all he wants to do is hold me but all he does is follow me as the doctor gives us permission to leave. we get no less than 10 feet away from the building until ben pounces on me, he peppers my face with kisses.
"we did it. we're free!" he says with a giddy laugh and spins me around. laughter bubbles from my chest, pure happiness washes over me. we're finally free. ben grabs my hand and pulls me toward the road. we walk hand in hand to the city, not caring what happens to us because we've been through the worst and nothing can tear us apart now. ben pulls me, adrenalin flying through us. our walk turns into a sprint and we run until we see the skyline appear, my heart pounding. the cool february breeze cooling down my hot face. we run to the post until we see rami. he runs and hugs us.
"you're out! i can't believe it!" he says happily. we laugh.
"thank you, rami. we wouldn't be here without you" i say. he shrugs.
"don't thank me. you have each other" rami says. my blood turns cold as i remember gwilym.
"where's gwilym" ben asks. rami shrugs.
"probably hiding from you" he says with a smirk. i laugh.
"he should be cause we're gonna beat him to a pulp" ben says.
"don't worry i took care of that for you guys" rami says holding up his fists. ben rolls his eyes.
"well thank you then. that saves me the hurt wrist" i say. rami chuckles.
"now you go enjoy yourselves" rami says. ben and i look at each other and decide to go to my apartment. we climb up the stairs, my heart pounds, anxiety coursing through my veins, will my parents be there? we reach the door. a red sign on the door reads 'FOR RENT: VACANT.' my heart goes to my throat. did.. they leave me? they couldn't have. i'm their son they.. they love me right.. well they loved me. ben puts a hand on my shoulder and the sign of my distress. my shaky hand turns the knob and pushes the door open. my eyes face an empty apartment that used to be my home. i go to what used to be my room. the only thing that remains is my baseball. i pick it up, tears prick my eyes. i let out a sob i didn't realize i was holding in. ben hugs me.
"it's okay, joey. maybe they'll come back" he says. i know they won't. they never do. i clench the ball in my hand tightly and hug ben back in a crushing hug. i take deep breaths and calm down. once ben and i go back to selling papers maybe we'll get enough money to rent out this place. make a home out of it. ben pulls away and kisses me softly. i almost forgot what his lips felt like. the last time we really kissed was at the police station. i hold him there, trying my hardest to enjoy it although my stomach tells me otherwise. i pull away, my breath heavy.
"i missed that" i say. ben smiles.
"me too." i take his hand and climb out the window onto the fire escape where it all began. i breathe in the fresh air. ben climbs out and stands behind me and wraps his arms around my torso. and we stand there, alive and fearless.

the end

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a/n: it's finally over! i'm so happy with how this turned out. i had a lot of fun writing this and i hope you all liked it. it means a lot to me and thank you for the kind words! let me know if you want any other stories like this in the future. thank you for reading! ily 💓