how much do you plan on hurting me before your happy (BOYXBOY)

chapter 4

POV Lavi:

POV Lavi:

The scent of vanilla and wood was attacking my senses. It felt nice and welcoming, as well as extremely comfortable. I felt like I was in heaven or something. I didn't want to open my eyes. Not right now. I'm sure waking up can wait a few more minutes. I just kept them closed until I felt the bed shift. I felt some pressure on my waist.

"Morning Lavi." said an unknown voice. I snapped back into reality. Who just said that?! My heart was pounding in my chest. Ok, I now know that I'm not at home anymore...Which brought up the huge question of Where the FUCK was I?! Slowly I opened my eyes and instantly fell into a deep, blue ocean. The person laying across from me was staring right at me, huge smile of his face. Before I knew it, I felt my face starting to heat up but I couldn't do anything about it. I was totally stuck. I couldn't move, couldn't scream. Not that I really wanted too. I mean, I just woke up to a beautiful guy that had his arms wrapped around me. Totally. Didn't. Want. To. Scream. He chuckled. Oh how nice it sounded as it vibrated in my ear.

"So...how'd you sleep?" He said with the huge smile. I squinted my eyes.

"Who are you?" His smile slowly dissappeared as a look on confusion crossed his face.

"You mean...you don't remember?" He got up and immediately removed his arm that was on my waist. The guy placed his hand over my forehead, like he was taking my temperature or something. I was seriously confused. The hell was this guy's problem?

"Remember what?" I said irritably. All of a sudden, all the memories started to come back to me. The school roof , the nurse's office, my (bitch) sister but nothing about how I got there with him...or how the hell I got in his bed. I felt the cold air hit my naked legs. Wait a minute, naked? "Oh my God!" I quickly got up and tossed the blanket off. I was practically naked except for an overly large t-shirt that went all the way down to my knees.I'm pretty sure my face was beet red by now. "Why the fuck am I not wearing anything except this dress thing? What did we do last night? Did you drug me?! That's explains a shit load of stuff you freakin'-" He interupted my rambling.

" Whoa, whoa, WHOA. Hold up... " He said while raising his hands up in surrender. " Calm down! We didn't do anything. I'm not like that."

" Then where the hell are my clothes?!" I paused to look around. My voice was cracking with anger. "And where the hell am I?!" The guy sighed.

" Calm down and let me finish! Do you remember when I took you home ?" He asked with a raised eyebrow.

" Yes but what does-" He held his hand up to silence me.

" Good. Now do you remember me asking if you wanted to sleep over?" I crossed my arms over my chest.

" Yeah but I don't remember agreeing!"

" Well that's because you blacked out before you gave me an answer." He had a guilty smile. "So I took that as a yes." I groaned.

"Oh great, I was practically kidnapped!" I paused. "So how the hell did I get in this?" I said while lifting the dress/over grown t-shirt. A light blush was on his face.

" I...kinda took you out of your clothes and changed you..." He said while looking at the floor. He sure was avoiding eye contact with me now. Now knowing what else to do, I smacked him on the arm."What the fuck man!"

" Hey, stop! That was just because I thought you would be more comfortable in something ... less..." I took a deep breath and tried to calm down.

"That involved my boxer as well?" I said with a blush. He flashed me a huge smile.

"Yes." I felt my face turn hot again. Before I could say anything, he continued. "I wanted to see if you had any more cuts on your body that needed to be taken care of. He was more serious that time. I scoffed.

"You had no right to do that." He rolled his eyes.

"You're joking right? You must be because you just..." he paused before saying something that I didn't want to hear. The words that I hate hearing most n this world. "You realize what you're doing to your body right? Your'e cutting, scarring, and burning your body and for what? To feel nice? To feel like you're still alive?" He paused. As if daring me to say something else but when I kept quiet, he continued. "No! What you're doing is running away from your problems. Do you even know what its like to physically be alive? " With each word he said, he just kept coming at me. While I was backing up, I felt scared. He looked mad, extremely mad. Every word he said, my gut was telling me to get the hell out of there. To run and be free. The pressure now was slowly suffocating me and I just wanted to... All of a sudden, he grabs my arm. Gently in my ear, he said, " I just want to make you feel alive. To try to help you with what ever problem you're facing." My heart began to flutter inside my chest. No, I will not be weak!

"No one asked for your help." I tried to push him off but again, I didn't have the strength to. He fixed his eyes onto me.

" You dont have to ask because whether you like it or not, I'm helping."

"But I don't want your help! I don't need it." I stubbornly say.

" Too bad because noone asked if you wanted it or not. It's a matter of force and I WILL force you to take it." His eyes bore into me as I stuttered for a comeback. I didn't know what to say to that...This has never happened to me before and I just wanted to leave and never come back! I feel like shit and for a person I just met, he sure is ready to become my AA counsler. What do I do?

" ...I don't know how to take this..." I say under my breath. Somehow he heard me.

" Take what?" He replied.

" Your help... I mean, I still don't want it but.." I looked into those blue orbs. "... I just dont know anymore... " He looked back into my eyes and smiled.

" You don't have to know what it means. Just know that I'll be here for the ride." I sighed and looked away.

" Okay." Was all I could say. Then I turned around and started to walk back to the bed. I didn't know I was crying till he pulled my into his chest. He was whispering sweetly into my hair.

"Shh, it's okay. Cry it out. You're safe now...it's all okay." For a long time, we just stayed like that.

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 pic of jesse on the side --->

yayayayayayaayayayay!!! chapter   four is done <3 finally i had to rewrite this  and write this again and again until i was finally happy with it :) 

hope you guys enjoy it :) 

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