Blended Family

Elliott

Mom and Lin were acting weird Sunday morning.  They were moving around in the kitchen simultaneously and nearly bumped into each other a couple times.  I knew this awkwardness.  They liked each other.  Gross.

No one liked to think of their parents having sex.  I didn't have to worry about that anymore.  I had something worse - my mother sometimes dated.  Over the years, I'd met a couple of the guys.  They were all alright, I guess.  I'd never actually lived with a guy she'd dated though.

The only reason we were all together was because of Alex and Jack.  I'm still not sure how Joey and I got roped into this.  Life was perfectly fine before hand.

Lin seemed like an okay guy, but I still despised Joey.  She was way too smart for her own good.  I was smart too, but I really couldn't care less about school.  As long as I got a C average I'd probably get to play football at whatever school I wanted to go to.  I might not get a scholarship, but my parents made good money.

Now that I was living with Joey I think my mom saw how much of a slacker I really was.  Joey was Suzy High School.  She easily got straight A's and did all sorts of extra curricular activities, including the debate club.  I would never admit it, but she intimidated me a little bit.  She was crazy smart and had a quick comeback for everything.

Several of my teammates had a crush on her, but were terrified to ask her out.  I wondered if that's what she wanted.  I think it gave her a certain sense of joy to know people, especially boys, were afraid of her.

I plopped myself down on the couch Sunday morning with a couple slices of toast.  Call me childish, but I turned on Spongebob Squarepants.

Mom and Lin were pretty quickly dressed and had their shoes on.  "We're gonna run a couple errands," Mom told me.  "Can I trust you to behave yourself?"

"Of course," I told her, and she gave me a little look. I could detect a hint of amusement there.

"We'll be back in a couple hours."

I settled in, lazing around in my pajamas.  I could start my homework, but I still had the whole day ahead of me.

Like the dork she was, Joey had already started her homework.  She came out with her laptop, settling on the other couch.

"The WiFi sucks in my room," she told me.  Like I cared.  A few minutes later she said, "Will you turn that down please?"

I sighed heavily and turned it down a few notches.

"Why are you doing homework at 11:00 in the morning on a Sunday?" I asked her, yawning.

"Because the little kids will be back in the afternoon and I can actually do my work in peace and quiet?" she said, eyes on the computer.

"Oh please," I said.  "You've always done your homework on Sunday mornings.  Saturdays even."

"So what if I do?  I get straight A's."

"No one likes you," I told her.

She gave me a dirty look.  "Everyone likes me."

"Keep telling yourself that," I countered. 

"Who doesn't like me?" she asked, setting her computer aside.

"The entire football team," I reminded her.

"Besides those idiots," she said.

"Hey, those idiots are my friends," I said stupidly.  She laughed.  "All the guys in your grade are terrified of you.  Guys in my grade are terrified of you.  You'll never get asked ut."

"That's fine," she said.  "They're all immature douchebags.  I'm not interested."

"You're such a snob."

"Having standards doesn't make me a snob," she said.  "Sorry if I'm not some bimbo cheerleader who will spread her legs for anyone with a heartbeat."

I rolled my eyes and decided not to comment further.  Obviously, she didn't care that half the school thought she was a snobbish prude.  That was probably an SAT word.

After a while, she got up to get a drink.  She was wearing some tight-fitting yoga pants and a little top.  Despite myself, I couldn't help but admire her body.  She was slender but was obviously active.  Her volleyball had done well for her arms.  They were toned.

As she walked back, I took a look at her rear end.  I'm a guy; I can't help myself.  She had a cute little bottom.

I quickly diverted my gaze back to the television, though I now had no idea what SpongeBob and Patrick had been up to.  After working a little longer, Joey stopped and narrowed at her eyes at me.

"Can I ask you a question?" she asked.

Nothing good ever came of that question.  I reluctantly agreed.

"Why do you really not want me on the football team?" She studied me, waiting for my response.  I thought for a moment about how to word my answer.  I didn't want to sound sexist but the truth was, it was a rough, physical sport.

"It's just...it makes guys uncomfortable to have girls playing.  We're supposed to be tackling each other.  How would we feel if one of us injured you?"

She let out a chuckle/growl.  "Or, how would you feel if one of us tackled you?" she countered.

"You'd get hurt," I told her.

"I'm not worried about breaking my nails," she said.  "And they have pads for a reason."

"That only protects you so much," I tried to explain.  "Look, you've got tons of sports where girls can play.  Basketball.  Soccer.  Tennis.  Girls and boys can play.  What's the big deal about one?"

She sighed and rolled her eyes like I had no idea what I was talking about.  She picked up her laptop and headed for her bedroom.

"What?" I asked.

"It's the principle of it all," she said, stopping and turning.  "You've never been told you can't do something because of who you are."

I tried to think of an intelligent response but I couldn't.  She looked at me for a few moments as if trying to figure out why I was such an idiot.  After a few moments of silence, she turned and went down the hall to her room.

I let my head fall against the back of the couch.  Real smooth, Elliott.