Saudade // ashton irwin au

2

There were a lot of things that I remembered about Ashton.

For example, the way he acted the first time we ever spoke to each other.

He was so worried to see me crying, and I was just some random stranger.

--

I was walking down the hallway to my large high school, avoiding everyone. My best friend Calum, a boy I’d known since the second grade, was rushing to walk beside me.

“Tahlia! Tahlia, wait up! Please!” Calum cried, nearly catching up with me.

I was avoiding him for one reason and one reason only; I wanted to be left alone.

My parents had been arguing a whole lot lately, and it was getting to the point where my mom threatened to divorce him. Last night was the first time I ever cried about it.

Calum knew about the fighting, but not that my mom said she’d divorce him.

Telling Calum would make him comfort me, but I didn’t want comfort. I didn’t want pity. I just wanted to be by myself. I wanted to go home, but home was not a good place for me right now.

“Tahlia, why’re you avoiding me?” Calum finally caught me, his hand wrapped around my arm and he stopped me from walking any further. I turned to look at him, and his face automatically dropped. “Tahlia, why’re you crying?”

I hadn’t even realized I was crying. Was I really crying? I reached up to wipe away a tear, sniffling a bit.

“What are you talking about? I’m not crying.”

“Yes you are, babe. What’s wrong?” His mouth turned into a frown. I didn’t like this.

“Calum, nothing is wrong. I’m fine. Let me go.”

I struggled to pull away from him, my arm slowly slipping out of his grip as I tried harder and harder.

“No, we need to talk about this.” He said.

I rolled my eyes. “There’s nothing to talk about.” I pulled away finally, turning my body and then bumping into a much larger body than mine and stumbling back.

“Oops!” The person chuckled. “Sorry, didn’t see you there. You’re so tin—hey are you okay?”

I looked up at the person, blushing as I stared up at the curly headed boy in front of me. I had never seen him before in my life. He was extremely attractive.  He frowned down at me, worry spreading across his face.

“I’m, uh, fine. Sorry, I’ll watch where I’m going next time.”

I quickly walked past him, heading away from the boy and Calum. I needed to be left alone. I really wanted to be left alone.

--

I regretted not speaking to Ashton longer that day. I regretted it so much.