Q/A + Reminders

CAN BOYS AND GIRLS BE JUST FRIENDS

Question

If there is any problem in guys and girls being "just best friends"?

ANSWER

Yes! there is a problem in it ! Because guys and girls can never be just friends!

Can a man and a girl be just friends?

It is an eternal question set out to answers since several decades now and endless surveys and debates have been done to find the answer.

If I start giving its answer from Islamic point of view you guys will start saying that Islam is hard to follow and it doesn't give us freedom and In today's society western culture has brainwash us so much that we let the shaytan win and start questioning our own deen (religion).

Anyways lemme just go back to the question. I will try to answer it using the knowledge of science and serveys that have been done.

For most of the human history men and women basically lived in a homosocial world until they got married meaning men only hung out with the men and women hungout with women. Even after marriage men and women for most part continue to have distinct and separate social lives - men hang out with other dudes all day and at work there were only males and they studied in male only college in Modern Times. Women stayed at camp or at home and hung out with their girl pals. It really wasn't until 19th and early 20th century that the cross gender friendship became a thing. As more and more women entered the ones predominantly male workforce and University system. Men and Women had to figure out how to have a relationship with each other which would be "just friendship". And hundred years later we are still trying to her find out!

When it comes to this burning question, everybody's got an opinion and to share. So let's first find out what bonafide scientists have discovered on the subject.

In one study, researchers at the University of Wisconsin brought 88 pairs of cross-gender friends into a lab. The pairs were required to promise in front of each other that they would refrain from discussing the study after they left the lab. They were then separated and asked a series of questions to gauge their feelings towards their opposite gender friends.

Researchers found that while women were generally not attracted to their male friends and saw the relationship as strictly platonic, the men usually had some feelings for their lady friends. Not only were the guys more attracted to their supposedly platonic female buds, they also mistakenly believed that the feelings were reciprocal, and they were more willing to act on it and take the friendship to the next level.

Thus, the study suggests that women generally think that guys and gals can "just be friends," while men are secretly hoping there's a chance their relationships with their female friends can be something more. Basically, this study gives us the scientific explanation for the "friend zone." Women and men are often on completely different wavelengths when it comes to their cross-gender relationships!

So my dear sisters if you are in friends with a boy maybe your intentions are all pure but you never know what other person is thinking and what's in his mind what are his intentions. He may be telling you one thing but in his mind a must be something else.

Now let's move towards Islamic point of view.

It's the party time cause it's your last paper or you completed your project or something else like that and you suggest to hangout with your friends with your group but the problem is your group is made of both boys and girls.

"We are just friends" you protest , when anyone brings up the issue and the brother may say "She is just like a sister to me" .

Key phrase "like a sister" you aren't really his sister which means there are limitations in how he relates to you.