Someone to stay

~ Broken Heart ~

Pov Beca

It was only 6:00 a.m. and I was already awake. I will have slept just 3 hours, and a busy day awaits me, very well. I turn slowly to my left and notice how the girl on my side sleeps placidly. A few pale rays of sunshine filter through the window resting on her face. I can't help but notice the differences, it's not her.

No one can be like her.

I desperately tried to sweep her away from my thoughts, to lock her in a remote drawer of my mind but every morning, every evening, and at any time of the day when I'm not busy, she pops out. Mostly. It's like an annoying pop up that doesn't want to close and keeps coming back. It's like a song that repeats itself in your mind until you get bored, until you get exasperated, until you find another one and replace it.

But I can't. I just can't change the record in my head, in my heart. There's only one name written, and it's hers. But how did I get reduced? I know that I should have gone further, I should have overcome it. It's been years now. Since that damn day my brain seems to have gone into default mode. As much as I try to change the register, it all goes back to the starting point.

I have to stop.

My gaze slips over the silhouette next to me and I can't suppress the frustration I feel. Despite the night spent with Crissie (she is called that?... I think) has been more than eventful, if you understand what I mean, there is nothing that can take away the enormous weight that every morning I feel on my chest. I know that spending every night in a different pub between alcohol and sex is wrong, but now it's the only way out that I have. Although my liver is asking for mercy at the moment.

I slowly move the sheet and try to make as much silence as possible, getting out of bed so I can get dressed. The room looks like a battlefield, as always. Fortunately, I can find a shirt and a short at the foot of the bed.
My attention is captured by my iPhone, which never ceases to light up to report messages received last night. I didn't really pay much attention to it, I didn't want to interrupt what I had started and so I left it on the chest of drawers near the door.

They seemed to have gone crazy on the Bellas group, there were more than 50 messages in the conversation, Amy contacted me several times, as well as Stacie. What the hell happened so urgently?

Without waiting any longer, I leave the room and head to the kitchen to prepare my coffee, my only salvation. After filling a cup, I lean with my forearms to the island of open space and finally start to check the notifications received in these hours.

I instantly immobilize myself, I also forget how to breathe. It's not possible.

👯♀ Bellas 🎶🎤

Chloe Beale: Girrrrrrlllssss, I have to give you some important news 😻

Aubrey: Really? What is it about Chloe?

Jessica & Ashley: Oh, my God, what happened? 🤩

(don't ask me why, but they share the number)

Stacie long leg: Go ahead and shoot, we want to know 🙄

Fat Amy: Come on, ginger. We are all ears 👂

Chloe Beale: Get ready...

Fat Amy: oh come on, you fell asleep on the screen?

Chloe: I got engaged officially!!!!!! In June I'm getting married 😍😍😍😍❤️❤️❤️❤️💍💍💍

Aubrey: Oh, my God!

Flo: Chloeeeeee congratulationssss 😘😘😘😘

Chloe Beale: obviously you're all invited, I'll give you the details later, but I'm so excited! 🤩