Wattpad Helpline | ✓

❝i'll give you a b for the effort❞

Hotline Girl | Pizza Boy

~

"Hello! This is -"

"Hey, hotline girl. It's me again."

"Pizza boy! It's been a while. I honestly thought you were gone for good, but you've reappeared, unfortunately. How've you been? Eat any good pizza recently?"

"You sound much more relaxed than before. I thought you told me to stop annoying you."

"Well, I hate to admit it, but you have been extremely entertaining so far. Wattpad Helpline has been quiet lately. I usually end up spending my time just playing Candy Crush."

"Candy Crush, huh? Not writing?"

"Are you STILL trying to find my account?"

"Yes. And I think I've narrowed it down to three accounts."

"Oh, really? Well, let's hear it, Sherlock."

"Ahem. You ready to be blown away by my spectacular detective skills?"

"I'm ready to see you make a fool of yourself because of how wrong you are."

"I'm going to pretend you didn't say that, because you're going to regret it and I don't want to say, 'I told you so' when I end up being 100% correct."

"Sure you are, pizza boy. Hit me."

"One - @bakkstreet4life998 - yes, that's with two 'k's. You're a fan of the Backstreet Boys and you've written two smut books about them, which I'm not going to talk about, because frankly, I'm traumatised."

"...Are you serious? When have I ever indicated I liked the Backstreet Boys? Wrong!"

"I mean, you sound like someone who's got the lyrics to 'I Want It That Way' memorized by heart, but moving on."

"I mean...you're not wrong. The Backstreet Boys are iconic with a capital I. But no, that's not my account."

"Fine. Número dos - @cloudymarshmallows_xx. There are five books on your profile. Two are romances about bad boys, one's a Sherlock fanfic, and two are poetry. Am I close?"

"You actually seem to be getting colder. Nice try. You've got one more chance."

"Okay, okay. This one has got to be yours. @-BriannaJonas-. Your last activity was over a year ago, and you only have one book on your profile. It's called, "The Last Road", and I read it. It's good. You should continue it, Brianna."

"..."

"Hello?"

"How - in the everloving heck - did you find my account?"

"Wait! Are you kidding? That's your account?!"

"AHA! Jokes on you, pizza boy. No, that's not mine. So sorry. Boo-hoo. I guess I'm the one who has to say 'I told you so', huh?"

"Yikes, hotline girl. Well, I tried my best."

"I'll give you a B for the effort."

"Thanks. That's still better than what I got in school, though, so I'll take it."

"To be serious though, you'd really be better off not looking for my account. Seriously, it's just full of cringey fanfics. I was thirteen, okay?!"

"So you did write Backstreet Boys fanfiction."

"Ugh, shut up. You suck."

"So do you, hotline girl. You can at least pretend that I'm funny."

"You're terrible, and rest assured, I only put up with you because I savour every opportunity to say 'I told you so' to you."

"Oof. You, hotline girl, have no heart."

"You're not going to guilt me into saying your jokes are good. They're not. They're really not."

"I'll get you to admit that I'm funny one day. One day, hotline girl, mark my words."

"No way, pizza boy. No. Way."

ミ

A/N: I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Please remember to vote and comment, I love the support!