why am i still sad? if this happens everyday, why am i still hurt? why can't i withstand this? it's a daily experience, but it always leaves me broken. you pick at me, you torture me, you cut off my air. you stop me from smiling, you stop me from opening up, you stop me from making friends. what more will you do to me? when will you be satisfied? i used to say i was used to the pain. i used to be strong. but now, i realize, i'm not. you hurt me, you break me, you rid me of my joy. and i say, i say, next time i'll be stronger, next time i'll withstand this. but next time never comes. i just let myself get beaten down and hurt every time. for an eternity, i will be sitting here, hurt, waiting for you to finally stop. waiting for that next time when i'll be able to withstand this pain. but i am a weak being. i cry and cry and cry, but i stop for you so that you won't be hurt. i protect all the people in my life, but no one protects me. how am i supposed to do that when i'm hurting too. i'm riding a seesaw i shouldn't have to be on. i shouldn't be the one holding down all your weight. i too, want this weight lifted off me. i too, want to be at the top of this seesaw.
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