The Weight of Living Pt. 2

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The Weight of Living pt. 2

Now that you're here

Suddenly you fear you've lost control

Do you like person you've become?

Under the weight of living

You're under the weight of living.

Hermione started blatantly at the white-haired man in front of her. How was this possible? Was she seeing things, was it an illusion? Surely Draco Malfoy wouldn't be sitting on a street corner in the middle of London looking like he did? He looked like a ghost, there were heavy black bags underneath his eyes and he was so thin that his cheekbones stood out at a weird angle. He was as pale as a ghost too, but what really shocked her was his eyes as he looked up at her. They were empty, hollow, two silver pools of nothingness. It was like staring into the eyes of a glass doll, it was disturbing and unsettling. Every now and then she would see a small flicker of light in his eyes, but then it would disappear, almost like a Dementor had sucked all the happiness out of him and left him with nothing.

He was wearing baggy clothing, which made him look even skinnier, his platinum hair plastered to his face, darkened by the rain. Even his hair had lost its colour, there was truly nothing left but a shell.

It hit Hermione in the chest like a stunning spell and knocked the air out of her lungs. Without thinking she took out her wand and cast a water-repellent charm on Malfoy's clothes, at least that way he wouldn't be an empty, cold shell, just an empty one. She felt dizzy, the lack of air in her lungs was not helping at all. She never liked Malfoy, but seeing another human being like this tugged on her fragile heartstrings. Then she remembered the date and her chest tightened further. Today ten years ago, Malfoy was sentenced to Azkaban for life, but five years ago when Harry became the Minister of Magic he reviewed the case, lightening Malfoy's sentence. Hermione remembered the day very well, as she was on the review board.

5 Years ago, Dept. of Justice.

Hermione shifted uneasily in her seat, wringing her hands in her lap. She had never been a nervous person and when she was nervous she found effective ways of dealing with it, but today was different. Today she was going to decide if a person was going to live or die, and that person was Draco Malfoy. He had been in Azkaban with his father for the past five years now and the truth was, he was on her mind every single day. She was terrified to tell anyone about it, but she couldn't stop thinking about him. She couldn't stop resenting him. Her fingers lightly traced the scar on her arm, the one that read 'Mudblood.' That was all she was to him, nothing more than an abomination. He stood by and watched as that awful woman etched the words onto her skin and onto her soul, branding her forever. He stood sneering at her as Bellatrix tortured her, and she was sure that he would have joined in if Bellatrix let him. He was a foul little ferret, but he had cut her deeper than he realised.

Two weeks ago she woke up to discover that her period was a week late, which would mean that she was pregnant. She was overjoyed, maybe Ron would finally wake up and ask her to marry him. Ginny and Harry were already married, baby number one on the way, plus they had Teddy too. Hermione loved Teddy, she loved taking him out and spoiling him with trips to Hogsmeade to visit Honeydukes. She wanted kids of her own that she could spoil, mini versions of her and Ron. She could already imagine them, a small boy with freckles and red hair, just like his father, and a little girl with the same brown, curly hair as her mother. She practically skipped into St. Mungo's that morning to confirm the pregnancy. She didn't tell anyone, not even Ginny, she just wanted to be sure. She was in the perfect place to have a baby, she had been off her anti-depressants for a few months now and she felt great. She didn't crave the drugs and the pills anymore and she felt great. She was ready to have a baby.

Unfortunately things never seemed to work out for her, for when she left St. Mungo's later that morning her heart was shattered. She was not pregnant and the healers told her that she would never be able to have a child.

"Due to the extensive trauma your body has gone through over the years it is unable to support a fetus," one of the healers told her. They didn't have to tell her which trauma had ruined her like this, she knew it in her heart. The scar on her arm mocked her, it was not only a reminder of a very dark war, but it was also a reminder that she would never be able to have children of her own. Stubborn as she was, she refused to believe that it couldn't be fixed. They were wizards after all, surely they were capable of preforming miracles?

'I'm sorry, Hermione, there is nothing we can do."

She even went to muggle hospitals, but they couldn't do anything for her either.

It whad been a hard two weeks, she was torn between resenting Malfoy and relapsing back into depression. It was his fault, he stood by and watched. Even after the war and after he was locked up he still found ways to ruin her life and remind her of how worthless she was. She wasn't going to stand for it, she was going to get her revenge.

The clattering of chains snapped Hermione out of her thoughts as a steel cage was brought into the room. Inside the steel cage, hands and feet shackled, was Draco Malfoy. He kept his head down, not looking at anyone who was seated in the room before him. Harry cleared his throat, casting a glance towards his best friend to make sure she was alright. Hermione's face was emotionless, but her heart was racing.

"Five years ago you, Draco Lucius Malfoy, were sentenced to life in Azkaban for your crimes against the wizarding world, this hearing was put together to decide if you deserve a lighter sentence. Is there anything you can offer us before we start to make our decision?" Harry asked, pushing his glasses up his nose.

Malfoy finally lifted his head and Hermione almost gasped. He looked right at her, the slightest smirk on his face. His eyes were dark and dangerous and the looked right through her. She shivered as her blood ran cold, it was almost as if he knew what he was still doing to her and he was smug about it. The whole exchange took seconds and before Hermione could blink Malfoy had turned to Harry.

"Locations of dark artefacts and Death Eater hideouts."

Harry nodded and Malfoy rattled off the locations in a bored tone, as if he had somewhere better to be. When Malfoy was finished Harry spoke again.

"All in favour of not reducing Mr. Malfoy's sentence?" Hermione's hand went up, this time it was her turn to look at Malfoy smugly. She wanted him to die in Azkaban, but most importantly she wanted him to know what it felt like to have your happiness ripped out of you by your worst enemy.

"Very well, we move to reducing your sentence to 5 more years in Azkaban."

Hermione looked around, only her hand was up.

"Granger," Malfoy spoke, his voice sounded so different, dead and empty. Hermione opened her mouth, but nothing came out. She fumbled for the right words, but nothing came to her. She must have looked like a complete fool, just standing there with her mouth hanging open like a goldfish gasping for water. "Are you going to stand there gawking like an idiot all night or are you going to go home?" He snapped at her, clearly getting impatient.
She didn't know what to do, so she turned on the spot and apparated home.

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