10,000 Lost Thoughts

Chapter Three

*Authors note hey guys sorry haven’t posted in a while it would be great to hear some comments literally begin you guys and this one is dedicated to  Xelliex1197  because her fanfic is awesome better than mine I think its at 23 chapters so like go check it now ok thanks and enjoy vote and comment if you like it*

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The rest of the funeral day was a blur I didn’t really do anything much, but I wasn’t sad im sure I’ve put that but it got my thinking. The whole funeral was full of people I didn’t know well some I had seen on the same ward as Tommy, but others were just people, who I couldn’t even guess, so why at his funeral? I thought I knew my brother but maybe not. Why didn’t I know them? There was even someone right in the corner at the back alone, a man I think. Im sure I’d seen him before but no one really noticed him not even mum only me, maybe because everyone else was too engrossed with their own thoughts to stop and notice the man in the long coat sunglasses indoors and a hat on top. 

But I didn’t really want to think about him I only saw him on the saw out so I kinda forgot. I wanted to focus all my attention on my mum and her driving we were having a kinda of get together thing at our house mum had made little sandwiches on white beard with ham cheese and all different kinds…. Yum!? Should I be thinking yum after he died should I be sad should I be acting differently? “No” the little voice in my head said “no” wait that wasn’t in my head I turned around. There he was in the back looking healthy and happy well as happy as he could be with his um situation. “Don’t say a word don’t want people thinking you crazy before even moving to Australia sis. But no you should feel like you are…. And yes I can read certain thoughts it’s a perk” he winked at me then went. So he just appears to me why not to mum I could hear some anger but then I couldn’t ever be angry at him. Never ever ever. 

We arrived at our house there were some cars already there and people waiting outside my mum ran to open the door. She then went to put the things on the table but me I just went upstairs put some music on nice and loud left to think things. Why would he pick me to come back to? Maybe he didn’t even pick me but he got stuck with me? I really need to stop over thinking but I can’t I just have to he’s dead but I can see him what the???  I soon fell asleep at some point.

Hmm. What oh there is something bugging me quite literally I mean someone or something is poking me in the side most likely a person./ “Hmmm what” I answered wanting to go back to sleep and forget about this person with opening my eyes.  “Wakey wakey sleepy head” with that my eyes opened wide it was none other than Tommy. Oh Tommy. “I don’t want to waste my visit with you asleep wake up sleepy head tell me all about moving I want to know where you’re going”. Just a little groggy took me a little while to process what he had said.

“Well I think were moving into a  street I think it’s a street called um Glenroy. Think mum found a small house or something there that is if we move there she’s applying to be  a nurse and I know she’ll be away on nights and stuff to pay and get money but im like 17 now so im sure I can manage on my own and you’ll visit me won’t you, Tommy?” He looked me in the eye was he scared? No Tommy was never scared he was always the brave big brother through everything but maybe now? Was he scared for me no what is there to be scared of? I mean im only moving half way across the world, that sounded better and less scary in my head most thinks do right? 

“Rosie um im not sure if I can visit you I think I can but no guarantees. But im sure if I can’t you’ll be fine and I’ll come see you before you go and you’ll come back to see my grave so we will see each other just if we don’t be care lil sis?” I don’t know weather it was a question or a statement. But what he might not be able to then he would completely be dead no connection we would have to come here more often I would make sure even if I had to get a job pay to fly to see him he was my brother even dead?! Then someone with my observant eye noticed he called me Rosie we never call each other Rosie and Tommy well sometimes im lazy and just called him Tommy. But he always calls me Roe, or Rosie cheeks.