it's so lonely here

I like LIKE You

Ethan's POV
I walked outside to the patio and facetimed Gray.
"Hey E what's up?" he said on the other line.
"I need you help gray."
"With what?" He questioned, "everything good over there?"
"Yes, more than good, that's the problem."
"Dude I'm fucking lost so you better spit this out quick."
"I want Emma to be my girlfriend," I whispered, "this last day spending time with her solidified my feelings. I want to be with her, but I don't know what to do or how to ask her. I don't want things to get awkward or break up the sister squad.
"Whoa okay slow down, you're not going to break up the sister squad or make things awkward. You have feelings for Emma and she has feelings for you, what could go wrong? I say go for it E."
"Really?"
"Really," he responded giving me a nod, "it's now or never dude."
"How should I bring it up to her?"
"I don't know dude. I'd just sit her down and tell her how you feel. She'll understand."
"Okay, I think I'm going to wait and tell her tomorrow morning, that way if she doesn't feel the same we'll have some space to avoid awkwardness."
"Whatever you want dude, but you better do it tomorrow then. No coming home without a possible girlfriend," he chuckled.
"Thanks Gray, you're the best."
"Dude I know, also mom and cam say hey, see you tomorrow."
"See you tomorrow," I hung up the phone and sat back in my chair. God was I really about the ask Emma Chamberlain to be my girlfriend?

I walked up the stairs to Emma's bedroom to find her passed out watching Jesery Shore. She looked so peaceful.  I climbed into bed and pulled the covers over us, causing Emma to stir. "Hello?" she asked confused. "Just me Em, go back to sleep." She closed her eyes and scooted closer to me. I set an alarm for 10 am and allowed myself to drift to sleep as well.

I woke up to my alarm blasting in my ear. I quickly shut it off and started to shake Emma awake. "Emma, Emma, wake up Em," I said while gently shaking her. "Huh?" she said and she rolled over to look at me. "What is it E?" she questioned. I need you to drive me to the airport soon, my flight leaves at one. "Oh okay, when do you want to leave?" she said while rubbing her eyes. "Uh how does twenty minutes sound? We could stop for coffee quick on the way," I suggested. "Sure," she giggled, "especially since I now have PTSD whenever I'm near my coffee machine." We both laughed and started to get ready. Emma went to the bathroom to change as I walked down to the kitchen. God I was starting to get nervous. "What if she says no? What if she laughs or thinks it's a joke?" I thought to myself. I need to stop before I chicken out. "Ready to go?" Emma asks as she grabs a blue poopy jacket. "I guess," I shrugged. "You good E?" she says, slowly putting her hand on my arm. "I'm great," I replied, "I just need coffee." She smiled back at me and we walked out to her parking garage.

We grabbed coffee and bagels to go so we could eat in the car. "So," I said breaking the silence. "Soooooooooo," she replied, smiling over at me, "should I start driving?" she asked. "Nah I think we still have some time to kill. I actually wanted to ask you something." Oh shit E are you really about to do this. You better not fucking chicken out. Just like Gray said, you gotta shoot your shot. Nothing bad will happen, c'mon is Emma, you shouldn't be worried. "E?" she said waving her hand in front of my face, "you've been spacing out a lot today, are you sure you're okay?" "Yes, yes I'm fine," I replied, "but I do need to ask you something." She nodded for me to continue. I took a deep breath and said, "Swear you're not going to laugh at me?" "Not unless you say something stupid, dumbass," she joked, "no E, I promise I won't laugh, now tell me what it is." Okay E, you've gotta do it, it's now or never. "I like you," I blurted out, "I like like you, you know? I like you more than a friend," I said searching her eyes for any type of response.
Emma's POV
Holy fuck am I hearing this right? Ethan FUCKING Dolan just told me he likes me, no scratch that, Ethan told me he like LIKES me. What the fuck. As soon as those words left his mouth I felt my heart explode in my chest. "I like you too," I blushed, "a lot," I nervously laughed. God Emma, could you be any fucking weirder? A wave a relief flashed across his face. "Oh thank god," he said, laying back into his seat. "So now what?" I asked, looking over at Ethan. "Huh?" he replied with a confused expression on his face. "Now what? I mean I like you, you like me, are we something or are we two people that just have feelings for each other?" "Oh, right," he blushed, how fucking cute, "I forgot to ask you.... Will you be my girlfriend, Emma?" "Yes!" I quickly replied, "a thousand times yes!' A smile crept across both of our faces as we started moving closer to each other. Oh god it was happening, I think Ethan Dolan is going to kiss me. We were centimeters apart, our breathing began to pick up and I noticed his eyes flash down to my lips and back up. Before I could process what was going to happen Ethan grabbed my face and smashed our lips together, creating, quite possibly, the most magical feeling I have ever experienced. I would say fireworks, but it was more. I felt like every fiber in my body was exploding out of me. For a second I swear my heart stopped. After what seemed like an eternity I pulled away to catch my breath. "Whoa," we said at the same time. "That was incredible," he added. We both leaned back into our seats and I pulled my seatbelt across my chest. "Better head to the airport, huh?" I said. "Yeah, wouldn't want to miss my flight," he responded. We drove the rest of the way in silence, but it was the good kind of silence, comfortable. Ethan took my hand and intertwined our fingers together. "Hey there girlfriend," he said as I pulled over to the drop off lane of the airport. "Hey there boyfriend," I said, feeling my cheeks turn red, "it's going to suck being away from you for the next for days." "Tell me about it, but don't worry I'll call you every night to check on you, and I'll come straight over when we return," he said while unbuckling himself. We both got out of the car and I helped him unload his suitcase. I leaned against the back of my trunk as he stared deeply into my eyes. Those beautiful hazel eyes, I didn't ever want to look away. "I gotta go Em," he said. I let out a small sigh as he pulled me into a tight hug. "It won't be long, I promise," he said, "will you be okay?" I thought back to the past few nights. I guess with my new coping skills I'd manage, plus I didn't want to worry him, but I sure as fuck was going to miss his company. "Of course, I'll be fine," I said, "no need to worry, but I'll be missing you. Thanks for everything the past few days," I looked back into his eyes making sure he knew how grateful I was. He gave me a goofy smile and pulled me in for a quick kiss. "See you soon GF," he joked as he pulled away. "Ewww don't ever say that or we're breaking up," I laughed in reply. We gave each other one last look and then he turned and headed into the airport.

I got back into my car and took a second to process everything that had just occurred today. "I have a boyfriend. Ethan is my boyfriend," I said out loud. It was real, Ethan Dolan was my boyfriend. I shook my head to refocus and pulled my car out of the spot. As I drove home the sinking feeling in my stomach returned. "Stop Emma, you should be happy," I thought. Why couldn't I stay happy for longer than an hour. When I walked into my apartment I threw my stuff on the ground and slid onto my couch. It'll only be a few days until he's back and everything will be better again. I knew that he'd be back before I knew it, but I couldn't stop the loneliness from creeping in. It was the sadness and the anger taking over my body again. "I'm such a fucking loser," I thought with tears forming in my eyes, "I should be able to be alone for a couple days, what the fuck is wrong with me." Just like the night before, my feelings and frustrations began to rise. I retreated to my bathroom and when I was finished everything felt okay again. I shuffled into bed and closed my eyes. "He'll be back before you know," I reminded myself. I snuggled deeper into my blankets and fell asleep.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: heyyyy buckle up the next few chapters are kind of dark. Thanks for reading!!

Word Count: 1620