More Than That

History

Flashback
Fourteen year old Jayde stood next to her best friend August as he watched his oldest brother's body being lowered into the ground. She could see his shoulders shaking from him fighting to hold his tears in. Jayde moved her body closer to his so she could hold his hand in her own. She wanted so badly to hug him close to her, but she knew he wouldn't want everybody around him seeing him being comforted, so holding his hand would have to suffice for now. The few times she had visited August in New Orleans were always here happiest moments, this time was anything but happy. Seeing Mel lay so still with not even a grin on his face was so weird to her. She had always seen him with a smile on his face and his hand extended out her to put a few dollars in her pocket when he saw her.

"Here beybeh girl," he'd say to 12 year old Jayde when he'd give her money to hang out with August. "can't have my Jay Bird outchea wit' empty pockets."

That comment would always result in August saying, "Mane please, she ain't gon' even touch ha pockets when she wit' me."

That's the Mel she knew, the Mel that always smiled and laughed and took care of her like she was his own. The rest of August' family had already piled themselves into the family car, but he still stood at his brother's gravesite.

"Gon' to the car Bug, I'm coo' I just wanna stay here for a minute." Jayde didn't move.

If August was staying until the last bit of dirt hit Mel's casket, then so was she. They were in this together, if August was in pain, the she was too.

"Mel, I'm sorry big bruva. I'm sorry I wasn't there, I'm sorry I left home. I'll take care uh mama. I promise. You always told me I'd have to grow up, I guess it's time for that now."

Jayde tightened her hold on his hand. She wasn't leaving until he was ready to move.

"I won't cry, 'cause you said men don't cry. I ain't a luh boy no moe' I gotta be strong like you taught me."

"Kids," August mom called to them. "it's time to go."

August exhaled slowly before grabbing the two white roses that had fallen off the casket from the ground. He handed one to Jayde and kept one for himself. Their hands never untwined as they walked to the car behind his mother.

The whole time August' family was at his house he said nothing. He watched his mom, aunts, and uncles laugh as they shared memories of watching Mel grow up. His cousins traded stories of all the times Mel kept them out of trouble. August on the other hand stayed silent the whole time. He stayed glued to Jayde's side the entire time. The only time they were apart was when one of them had to use the bathroom. When everybody left August and Jayde went to his room.

"I remember the first time I came here, instead of that Cardi B poster you had a Mortal Kombat poster."

August just shrugged at her comment.

"Aug, smile. Please?"

The minute she said that something in him snapped.

"Smile? Fuckin' smile? My fuckin' bruva is gone! And you gonna tell me to smile!"

She was waiting for this. She knew he was due to break, she just wanted to push that break out. She didn't say anything she just let him get all his anger out. August never cursed at her, so she knew he was really hurting.

"You don't know what it feels like to lose someone!"

Just like her telling him to smile caused him to snap, his comments set a fire ablaze inside of her.

"I don't know what it's like to lose someone? Are you serious August?!"

By now she was yelling and looking for something to throw at him.