Dear Black Boys

Dear Black Girls,

As you guys know my experience with black guys is like this: <<<<<<<. It's terrible.
For some reason I thought that going from a predominantly white school to more blacks would be actually better. But I definitely got lied to. I don't know what dream I was flying in on or what someone to told me because sweetie child. But young black boys who see grown ass black men disrespect there own, why would they not be expected to follow ?

But I decided to write this book about standards. This chapter is totally my opinion, if your dream is to get a guy who's poor and "build him" then so be it. But, this chapter is not for you. You will get your feelings hurt if you continue.

Don't sue me.

For black women, we have these natural instincts to protect, to love, and to guide. Basically we are everyone's mule. What does that mean? It means when there's trouble we are supposed to be "Black woman strong" and protect the people when something goes wrong period. But I learned that that is definitely the path I will NOT be taking. I will definitely be sitting back and smelling the roses because I'm not breaking nails.

Y'all know how black people use that excuse "cmon sister. Put a brother on" but wait... I thought black girls were too ghetto for you ? "Brother".

I am so tired of watching black girls kneel down to their "Kings". You're health matters too! You're mental state matters too! You deserve breaks. You deserve healing.

I watch young girls say "you need to know how to cook to have a man" or "you need to clean after him". Like destiny child in Cater To You? HA. Couldn't be me.

In my house, I will be the money maker and so will my husband. I'm not settling for less than what I want. If I want to be a doctor what do I look like chasing after a nurse? I'll look like a clown.

I have clear standards of what I want and it's way higher than any regular teenage girl. So high that I'm pretty sure I won't be having a boyfriend anytime soon. But do I care ? Nope. But will I complain while expressing this? Yes.

Today's young men think that they can become rappers and then get the "well here is a million dollars. Just sign here". Like all the girls that have boyfriends who are attempting the rapping career post their mans SoundCloud each week. And the song isn't even good!

Sad case. Once again, Couldn't be me.

I think as black girls we don't see much of the whole "luxurious feminine rich black woman" a lot. We get the stereotypical things like "angry black woman" or "black woman gets dragged out of her home by her husband as the mixed girl watches with the red wine of glass in hand".

Too much detail ?

In all honesty , I love seeing black girls doing their thing. Not settling for anything less than  what they are worth. Not taking up for anyone bullshit. Bossing up in general. Seeing that makes my heart warm because those are people other black girls look up to.

My little sister will not be settling for anything less than her worth, I won't allow her to. I have to make sure she knows that she's smart and beautiful and no one better tell her otherwise.

It's sad to say but we have to raise our black girls strong at the start but we are the most mistreated and abused group in the WORLD. Never let your guard down.

But that does not mean you have to be "strong" all the time. There's a difference between crying and showing your weak spot in front of your enemies and crying to someone who actually cares about you. There's a difference between fighting for your priorities and fighting to get some credibility because you wanna be superwoman for the day.

I feel like I'm getting off track though, so back to standards. Never settle for less even in your teen years. Watch for those potential basketball players because they can make your rich, you never know if that could be your soulmate so.

So honestly, do better. If you feel like you have trust issues with your man, fix it. If it can't be fixed it's time to move on.

Remember that money >>>>> boys. And your mental health is way better than a high school fling.

I would say don't get attached and have some side men but y'all may not rock like that so I'll leave here.

Just do better and keep everything up. You're doing great. Keep exercising, doing your skincare routine, taking your medications, meditating, doing your homework and keep doing you. ♡