(i feel like this is turning into a basic emo fanfic, don't worry, i won't have many self harm/suicidal episodes in this book, i might do one more. i don't want to be one of those cringey basic emo books, not that there's anything wrong with emo stuff, i used to be emo haha, i just don't want it to turn like that.)
i wince as brendon wraps the bandages on tightly. he's muttering to himself as he wraps my arm. it's hard to listen to him because i'm in so much pain. the cuts cover my body, and i'm embarrasses over him seeing me.
"oh baby, why? why'd you do it?" he looks at me with tears in his eyes.
i feel my heart shatter a little. i did this. i made him cry, i made his gorgeous eyes bloodshot.
"i..i.." my voice is breaking, and i don't want brendon to see me cry over this.
"lovely," he gently says and holds my hand.
" i did it because i didn't want to deal with the hate. i didn't want to go through pain. i just wanted relief. i didn't want to feel like a failure, a disappointment. i did it because you seemed distant and i thought you didn't want me anymore, so i deserved it."
he stares at me after that, for a minute. then he reaches and picks up my arm, kisses every inch of it. he does the same on my legs, stomach, and other arm.
"baby. i'm sorry, so so sorry. tour has me stressed. i will pay attention to you every second i get. i will never not want you. and, i know it might seem a bit early or abrupt, but i want you to remember that i love you. i always will."
i stare at brendon for a moment, in awe of those three words.
"oh my god, bren i love you too."
and then we kiss. a long, gentle kiss, clinging to the beauty of that moment.
short cuz i'm running out of ideas, maybe want a refresher from those 2 long chapters. please suggest something to happen in the comments, i'm fresh out of ideas.
